


A Shared Madness

by Purpleprose556



Category: Joker (2019)
Genre: Characters glorifying violence, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/M, Obsession, Oral Sex, Past Violence, Rough Sex, Unhealthy Relationships, questionable morals
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-07
Updated: 2020-02-15
Packaged: 2021-01-24 16:28:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 24,973
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21341242
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Purpleprose556/pseuds/Purpleprose556
Summary: Sadie danced for the men of Gotham City, but the only one she wanted was a total stranger - the insane criminal who called himself Joker. When he escaped from Arkham Asylum, she made a dangerous choice to help him, changing their lives - and the future of Gotham - forever.
Relationships: Arthur Fleck/Original Character(s), Joker (DCU)/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 15
Kudos: 118





	1. Down The Rabbit Hole

**Author's Note:**

> I've been a fan of Joker since I was a kid, and the movie inspired me to write my first story about him. I hope you like it - thanks for reading!

}} Down the Rabbit Hole {{

The music thumped through the building, a solid pulse that set my nerves on edge. I only had a few minutes until I went on, and all of Gotham was tense, awaiting the sentencing of the Joker.

I turned my back to avoid what used to be Jade's station and stared intently at my reflection. My makeup and hair were done to perfection, thanks to a lot of help from Bette and Candy. Letta had helped me with my outfit, a black and blue two piece set that glittered like diamonds under the club lights. Blue was my signature color, and black...that was for Jade.

"Small crowd tonight." Letta checked her lipstick in the mirror and made a face. "Mostly yuppies."

Candy groaned and adjusted her top. "Ugh. Probably hiding out because of...you know."

"The trial," Bette finished, and glanced at me. "Have you been following it?"

The girls tensed and exchanged glances, but I shrugged. "No more so than anyone else." It was a lie, but I didn't want to think about any of that right now. The last thing I needed was to get emotional before a routine.

"Really?" Candy turned to me with a confused frown. "I would have thought you'd want to, what with..."

"Hey, uh, help me with my makeup," Letta interjected, giving me an apologetic smile. I turned away, staring at the door that lead to the stage, breathing deeply. Desi would be finished soon. I had to calm myself.

_It's over. _

_They're dead. _

_He killed them._

The Joker was a lunatic, they said, who had no remorse for his actions. So much pity for the victims. "Solid young men, best of the best", Thomas Wayne called them, even after admitting that he didn't know them personally.

_Scum._

_All of them._

The door flung open and Desi strolled in, scoffing when she saw my outfit. "Seriously, Sadie? Black for mourning? You're a fucking stripper, not a widow."

"For god's sake." Bette glared at her. "Jade and Sadie were best friends."

Desi rolled her eyes. "Yeah, and it's been a month. Move on."

I moved to lunge at her, but Candy grabbed my arm to stop me. Last week, after having enough of Desi running her mouth, I lost my temper and threw a lamp at her head. It didn't hit her, but she went berserk and ran to Sam, who told us that the next girls who were involved in any kind of physical altercation were going to get fired.

"Even you, Sadie," he'd told me. "I know things are hard for you right now, but I can't have this shit in my club."

I had no choice - I'd have to play nice. I'd apologized to Desi through gritted teeth and focused on my performances. My job wasn't great, but there wasn't anything else I could do. I had no family, and Gotham wasn't exactly brimming with possibilities for an exotic dancer who couldn't afford college. 

Desi smirked at me as she began to undress. "Dance all you want, but those guys are too scared of that freak and his followers to give good tips." She threw her clothes into the floor and headed into the bathroom, slamming the door behind her.

I clenched my jaw and slapped my palm against the wall in frustration. _Bitch._

Letta approached me carefully. "Hey... ignore her, she's trash. Are you going to be okay to go on?"

"I'll be fine," I muttered, and took a deep breath before heading to the stage. I was safe on the stage. I could dance, and forget about everything. The trial, Jade, Gotham...all of it.

I was free, even if was just for a little while.

~~~}}{{~~~

The girls were gone when my shift was done. Desi was right - tonight's customers consisted of yuppies reluctant to part with their cash, and spending half the night glancing at the door as if the devil himself was waiting outside. To them, Joker probably _was_ the devil, an evil being sent to torment innocent souls.

I saw him as karma, personified. He killed the men who destroyed my best friend and made my life a living nightmare.

"Have a good weekend, Sadie," Glen called, lugging a mop and bucket to the restrooms as I passed him on my way to the dressing room. "Get some rest, okay? You look tired."

"I'll be fine." I gave him a small smile and sighed deeply when the dressing room door closed behind me. 

The silence crept up around me like ivy. At home, I couldn't stand it - I'd play music, put on the TV, or even open a window to listen to the sounds of Gotham City. I hadn't been alone since childhood, and the ache it produced was too much to bear.

Jade's station was just as she'd left it, with Polaroids of the two of us and sketches of the dream house she wanted to build. One of the pictures was of us showing off our Alice in Wonderland tattoos, her with the Cheshire Cat on her upper back, and me with the Mad Hatter on my right hip. It was our favorite book, and the first thing we'd bonded over in high school.

After her death, I'd gotten a Cheshire grin on my upper back to match hers, just to feel like I still had a part of her with me. My fingers traced the tattoo, which ran from my right shoulder to just under my neck. A wicked, knowing grin. 

Just underneath it was something I'd added in honor of the Joker. **_Put on a happy face._** It was what he'd written in the dressing room on the set of Murray Franklin's show. And around my Mad Hatter tattoo, I'd added another quote of his from that night: **_You get what you fucking deserve_**.

"Looks like someone's got a crush," the tattoo artist had teased me, and I didn't bother to deny it. I'd been following Joker since his famous interview on Murray Franklin's show, eager to get my hands on anything to do with him. It was becoming a bit of an obsession, but at least I wasn't alone. Gotham, and the rest of the world, was fascinated with Joker.

Tonight was his sentencing. He'd probably be committed to Arkham Asylum for the rest of his life.

_Do they allow visitors?_

Out in the club, I could hear Glen talking to Bane, who was probably ready to get home. We lived in the same apartment building, and we usually walked home together. No sense in keeping him waiting.

Bette had left out a fresh towel for me and I used it to wipe down. I was too exhausted to change, so I put my hair up and pulled on a sweatshirt and sweatpants over my dance outfit. I'd shower after having a glass or two of wine.

After changing my shoes, I headed back out to the club, waving at Glen as I left. Bane was standing by the door, waiting for me with a huge grin. "Big night tonight."

"You think so?" I tugged at my sweatshirt. "Seemed kinda dead. I only made two hundred bucks."

"No, the Joker's sentencing! Sam didn't let me put the TV on between sets, he said it would scare away the customers."

"Oh yeah, that's tonight. Forgot about that." I tried faking nonchalance but Bane just grinned knowingly. 

"Uh huh. Let's get home so we can watch the news. Unless you want to go to the courthouse?"

The idea was tempting, but I was beat. I smiled and shook my head. "Nah, I think I'll head home."

Bane nodded. "Yeah, we probably wouldn't even get to see him or anything."

The thought made my pulse quicken. The first time I saw the mugshots of him without his makeup, I actually gasped. He'd smiled for the camera, and his stare was so intense that it was almost frightening. He was very striking...even beautiful. Just thinking about the idea of seeing him in person was... stimulating. My heart fluttered at the thought, and I breathed in deeply to calm myself.

"You okay?" Bane frowned. "You seem nervous or something."

"No, sorry, I'm fine. So, um, how was your night? Did anybody give you any trouble?"

He shrugged his huge shoulders. "Nah. Didn't have to do much of anything."

"Aww." I pretended to pout and patted his shoulder. "I'm sure you'll get to rough up some jerks tomorrow."

Bane chuckled and held the door for me. "I kinda wouldn't mind that, you know?"

Cold air hit us like a wave, and I shivered despite my warm clothing as I stepped outside. The Velvet Lounge sat in the center of Gotham on Red Hood Lane, dividing the city between the haves and the have-nots. To the left was uptown, where all the Wayne family resided and the "respectable" inhabitants of Gotham lived and work. To the right was downtown, where the rest of us just managed to survive. Only a few miles away, the protesters chanted for the Joker's freedom outside the courthouse.

The lines were starting to bleed together, and thanks to the Joker, people were being forced to pay attention to us. 

Bane and I headed down the street to our apartment building, passing abandoned houses and shops. It wasn't too hard to imagine what this section of town might have been in its heyday, with quaint little stores and pretty homes. Now they were husks of what they once were, often serving as makeshift shelters for the homeless.

Bane glanced behind us as we walked. "Listen to 'em. They're really loud tonight. I hope Joker can hear them so he knows he's not alone."

I chuckled and put my arm through his as we walked. "If only the Joker knew you were his fan. He'd probably hire you as a bodyguard."

Bane's eyes grew wide at the idea, but then he frowned. "You think they're gonna kill him?" he asked softly. 

"I'm sure they won't," I soothed him quickly. "They'll probably put him in Arkham Asylum, though."

Bane nodded. "He'll be okay there. He's tough."

"Maybe he'll make friends with the Calendar Man." I snickered at the idea. 

"The guy who mailed bombs to the news stations every holiday?" Band frowned. "Huh. Maybe."

"Or the Tally Man. Victor Zsasz, the one with all the tattoos? They'd probably get along."

Bane chuckled. "How do you remember all this stuff?"

"Hey, I read the paper. Besides, half the guys I talk to in the club just want to gossip." We walked past a couple of protesters wearing clown masks and my heart jumped. Bane nodded to them in respect and they nodded back before heading into the night. I watched them go as Bane got out his key for the front door. 

"Home sweet home." Bane opened the door for me and bowed dramatically. "After you, my lady."

I laughed and headed inside, passing a few guys who glanced at me, then quickly looked away when Bane followed me in. They shuffled past us and propped the door open with a rock, lighting up their cigarettes as Bane and headed to the elevators. 

"I'm glad you're taking some time off," Bane said as he pressed the buttons to our floors. "You need a break."

"Yeah," I sighed. "It's been rough."

Bane frowned. "I miss her too. Just let me know if you need anything."

"Thanks, big guy." I gave him a quick hug before I got off my floor. "You take care, okay? I'll see you soon."

Bane waved and I headed down the hall, exhaling as I opened my front door. Part of me still expected to see Jade sitting in front of the TV, eating popcorn and making wisecracks about whatever show she was watching. The apartment was still in disarray, as I couldn't bring myself to go into her room and I couldn't be bothered to keep things as tidy as she'd liked. Her application papers to Gotham Design Academy were still arranged on a neat pile on the side table next to the couch, and her slippers still sat waiting by her bedroom. 

The apartment was ours, but until she'd died, it always felt like hers. She'd convinced the super to knock down a wall between our two bedroom apartment and the tiny studio next door so that we could have a huge closet. At the time, she'd been striking up a friendship with another tenant and kept hinting at a big project they'd both been working on. While rearranging our clothes, she'd casually asked me for my favorite Alice in Wonderland quotes, which I thought at the time was just her making conversation. 

I'd been working long nights at the club, wanting to save up for a trip to anywhere but Gotham, and when I came home one night, Jade was waiting and practically bouncing with glee.

"C'mon." She'd taken my hand and giggled as she led me to the new closet, which was right next to my bedroom. Behind the racks of clothes and shoes was a wall that displayed a mural of Alice in Wonderland characters - the smoking caterpillar, the Red Queen, the playing cards, and Alice herself - surrounded by my favorite quotes. "Remember that guy on the third floor? He's an artist, he did this for us. But watch." Jade pushed on the clock in the White Hare's hand, reveling a hidden door. Inside was a secret room, converted into a cozy reading nook. Large pillows covered the floor, and she'd hung Christmas lights to make the room glow. The Wonderland theme continued inside, with the Mad Hatter and the Cheshire Cat painted on either side of a small window. 

"Remember when we moved in? You said when you were growing up, you never felt like you could escape anywhere." Jade had giggled at my awed expression and hugged me tight. "Now you do. You can escape anytime, off to Wonderland."

It was the most amazing thing anyone has ever done for me. 

_And now she's gone._

"Stop," I whispered to myself. Tomorrow I'd have a good cry, but tonight...I needed to relax. Glen and Bane were right - I needed a break. I'd thrown myself into distractions for weeks now, and it was taking its toll. My body ached and my head was spinning from all the things going on with the trial and the memories they brought.

The silence was killing me. I grabbed the remote and turned on the local news, then headed into my room to change. A nice long, hot shower would do wonders right now. 

"Relax," I muttered to myself, and sat on my bed to pull off my shoes and clothes. "Let yourself relax, for once in your fucking..."

_"...Breaking news from our top story, Arthur Fleck, otherwise known as Joker, is at large with whereabouts unknown. He has escaped from Gotham Penitentiary with assistance from fellow prisoners and protesters..."_

I froze, then ran into the living room, staring at the screen in disbelief. They showed recent footage of Arthur smirking as he was led out of the courtroom, then cut to a shot of protesters on the courthouse steps. 

_"...with the help of an undeterminable amount of supporters, Fleck might be armed and is considered extremely dangerous. If you see..."_

"Holy shit." I went into my room and grabbed my robe from the floor, pulling it on hastily. Was Bane seeing this? Should I tell him?

What could we do?

What _should_ we do?

A door at the end of the hallway slammed and I ran to the door as voices shouted indistinctly. I tried looking through the peephole, but could only see some guys running down the hallway, probably on their way to the courthouse. 

_What do I do?_

Sirens grew louder as police vehicles flew down the street, red and blue lights flashing against the building and filling the apartment. I hurried to the living room window just in time to see Gotham Police barge into the apartment building next door, guns drawn. 

I drew back in shock, retreating to the living room while the news broadcast continued.

_"...minutes ago, with numerous witnesses citing a possible sighting of Joker on Red Hood Lane, heading downtown..."_

Another door slammed in the hallway. I rushed to the door and pressed my ear against it, straining to listen. 

Footsteps pounded as they got closer. No voices, just running...and laughing. A breathless, familiar sounding laugh.

I took a deep breath, grabbed the door knob, and pulled. 

The runner stopped short when I flung the door open, breathing heavily as he looked me over. 

It was him. Still dressed in the Arkham Asylum garb, all white, but covered in dirt and what looked like blood splatter. 

Arthur Fleck.

Joker.

I stared at him, watching as his lips curled as he stared back. "Knock knock," he whispered, and grinned.

A police siren from outside broke the spell, and before I could question myself, I stepped back and held the door open. "Get in. Quick!"

He raised an eyebrow, but hurried into the apartment, standing in my living room and watching the TV as I locked the door and bolted it. They flashed a picture of his mugshot, and Arthur giggled to himself.

"This way." I took his hand, trying to ignore how my heart leapt as soon as I touched him, and led him to the closet. 

"Wonderland?" he asked, studying the artwork. "Are you Alice?"

"Here." I pushed the clock, opening the wall into the secret room. His eyes grew wide and he chuckled with delight as he went inside, settling onto a large pillow. 

"There's a window...it's small, but be careful. Don't let them see you. I'll be back." I closed the door, my mind and heart racing. 

Police were on my floor now. I could hear their radios and the sound of their clicking boots. They were questioning everyone, asking if they'd seen or heard anything. Not many other people lived on my floor, so it was only a matter of minutes before they got to me.

A sharp knock made me clench my jaw, but I rolled my neck and shoulders and tried to force myself to relax. 

"Gotham Police! Open the door!"

I took out my ponytail holder and shook my hair around, breathing in deeply and putting on my best crowd pleasing smile.

_Showtime._


	2. Who Are You?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning - a character describes a past event that includes violence and attempted sexual assault (but does not go into details). I marked the passage with ~~~, so you can skip over that if you'd like. Please let me know if I should make any adjustments to better warn readers.

}} Who Are You? {{

"Gotham Police! Open up!"

_Breathe. Be aware. Stay centered. _

_Put on a show._

I widened my eyes just a bit more than normal when I opened the door, channeling my inner Marilyn Monroe. "Officers! What's happening?"

The police officers stared past me, but one seemed to look me over carefully. "Ma'am, there's an escaped prisoner in the city, we're going to need to check your residence." 

"Of course." I stepped back and offered a fake smile. "I just saw the news! How frightening! I was just about to take a shower when I saw what happened."

The officers shone their flashlights around, mostly ignoring me. The one who noticed me earlier stayed close, sneaking a look at my chest when he didn't think I was looking. "What's your name, ma'am?"

"Sadie." I clenched my jaw when I saw one of them go into Jade's room, but kept my cool. "How did he escape?"

"That's what we're going to find out." The officer looked me up and down again. "You live alone, Miss...?"

"Sadie. Yes, I live alone. I had a roommate but she died recently."

He nodded. "No boyfriend...?" His eyes glanced over me yet again. 

I managed a smile. "Well, my good friend Bane lives in the building as well. You might have seen him, he's very big. He used to be a pro wrestler before he worked at the club. He keeps me safe." I smiled at him, hoping he didn't see the hidden sneer underneath. 

"Good to hear." The officer gave me a condescending smile that was almost chilling.

"All clear," one of the officers said, leaving my room. The others filed back in the living room, nodding to the officer standing next to me. He was clearly in charge here. 

"Thank you for your time, ma'am," he said, giving me another chilling smile. "Please let us know if you hear anything." 

I nodded, holding my robe tight as they left to check the next floor. I could still feel that cop's creepy gaze on me, and I shuddered as I locked and bolted the door again.

Minutes passed, but they felt like hours. I waited until I couldn't hear the radios anymore, and the red and blue flashing lights no longer flooded the apartment. There were still police cars on the street and outside, but the cops were now on the move, looking for the escaped madman that everyone knew as Joker.

The man who was currently hiding in my home.

I carefully approached the closet, reaching for the clock to open the door. I didn't know Arthur Fleck. I didn't know Joker. He had murdered people, one on live television. I was glad he'd killed the three men who'd hurt Jade, but he didn't do it for her.

He was a stranger. A dangerous man.

Carefully I pushed the door open. The Joker was laying on the pillows, looking utterly relaxed. A cigarette blazed in his hand, the smoke wafting around him in a hazy aura. 

"They're gone." I closed the door behind me, my heart pounding against my ribs. "Are you..." I eyed the blood splatters on his clothes. "Did you get hurt?"

He brought the cigarette to his lips, inhaling while his eyes traveled over my body. Unlike the stares from the officer or the usual lounge patron, his gaze wasn't a predatory leer - it was more curious.

Joker exhaled slowly, filling the small room with even more smoke. "Who are you?" he asked, his tone almost playful.

"My name is Sadie." I ran my thumb along the sash of my robe and tried to smile.

"Sadie." He took another slow drag on his cigarette and exhaled with a smile. "Hello, Sadie."

I stepped forward, glancing out the small window. A police car circled the block while protesters in clown masks ran after it, throwing trash. 

"You should stay here tonight," I told him. 

Joker's head tilted quizzically. "Why are you hiding me?" 

"Because you helped me," I said without thinking. 

"I helped you?" Joker raised an eyebrow. "How exactly did I do that?"

I lowered myself on the pillows across from him. "You killed those men on the subway."

His eyes narrowed. "You knew them?"

"Not personally, but yes, I knew them." Behind the Joker, Alice sipped her tea and stared at the Mad Hatter and the March Hare. I gestured at the room around us. "My best friend did this for me. Jade. Those men killed her."

He paused, the smoke stilling around him. 

"We were working a late shift." I swallowed and curled my legs underneath me. "It was busy. Most of the girls were performing for a bachelor party. Jade and I were on stage, and those guys...they were already drunk when they came in. Loud, obnoxious. They asked for a private room with us."

Joker frowned, but stayed silent and watched me, waiting for me to continue.

~~~~~~

"It was horrible," I whispered, my voice shaking. "We kept telling them, no touching, but they grabbed at us, and told us to do our jobs and be good little sluts."

A low growl from Joker filled the room. It was oddly comforting.

"We told them we'd had enough," I continued. "We were going to get security, but they had ordered bottles of champagne and smacked us on the head. I was out cold, so they left me alone. But Jade...she was still conscious. She fought back. They tried to..." I shook my head. "Bane came in to check on us, and he saw us on the floor. Those guys ran out before he could catch them. Jade...when they'd hit her with the bottle, it broke and cut her neck. She was bleeding so badly, and the ambulance takes forever to get to our part of town. By the time they arrived, she was mostly gone. No one at the hospital could save her." I hugged myself, fighting back tears. "And those guys... they just left. The police weren't too interested in finding them when they found out that they worked for Wayne Industries. And then...later that night...you killed them." I laughed and wiped at my eyes. "You killed those worthless bastards."

After a few moments of silence, Joker spoke again. "Yes, I did."

~~~~~~

"Thank you," I said softly. 

He smiled. "So this is a reward? Hiding me tonight?"

I ran my tongue along my lower lip. His eyes followed the movement. "No, I...I mean, I want you to be safe. I've been watching the news, and I know what you did, but... I don't think you should be locked up in a jail or an asylum."

"Instead, I ended up in Wonderland." Joker looked around at the painted characters and chuckled. "I like it."

"You, um, must be tired. And hungry." I got to my feet and cleared my throat. "Do you want to stay in here or...I could show you the rest of the place. If you'd like."

Joker stared at me for a long moment, then nodded and stood up.

_Oh god._ "Okay." I managed a smile. "Let me show you around."


	3. Together, We Are Strangers

}} Together, We Are Strangers {{

Joker followed as I walked through the apartment, keeping a somewhat respectful distance. He seemed almost calm, as if he was merely accepting his current situation.

"This is my bedroom," My face burned as I pointed to my unmade bed. "You've seen the living room. Bathroom is right here, if you want to shower...that's Jade's room. I haven't gone in there since...and um, the kitchen, obviously. There's another bathroom here, with a tub if you'd prefer a bath." I bit my lip to try to keep from babbling and hurried to the windows to close the blinds. The cops might try to look into people's windows tonight, and I didn't want to chance anything. 

"It's nice." Joker glanced down at himself, tracing his fingers over the blood splatters. "You wouldn't happen to have any men's clothes, would you?"

"No, sorry...wait a second." I snapped my fingers. "I might actually have something," I told him, and headed to Jade's room. A few months ago, she'd dated an actor who occasionally spent the night and had left a couple of shirts and sweatpants here just in case. He'd moved away but forgot to pick up his extra clothes. 

I opened the top drawer of her dresser, trying not to dwell on the surge of emotions from being in her room. Joker needed my help - I needed to focus. After rifling through Jade's nightgowns, I found the sweatpants and a shirt that from Park Row Playhouse that said **_Who will you be today?_** It seemed almost appropriate. 

When I got back, Joker stood in the living room, watching the news. The announcer was going over his crimes, showing pictures of his victims. He smirked and ran his fingers through his hair, a casual gesture that made my stomach flutter. 

"Um." I walked up behind him, holding out the clothes. "Here. I can get more tomorrow."

He turned and grinned at me, placing his hands over mine as he took the clothes. "Thank you," he murmured, and winked.

The rush of warmth to my face nearly made me dizzy. "Of course," I whispered.

"I might take you up on that shower." His eyes traveled over my body. "Unless you want to take one first? I heard you mention something about it to the police."

I suppressed the urge to lick my lips. _Or we could go in together, let the water warm our skin while we play..._

"You can go first," I managed. "I'll get some food together while you're in there."

"Thank you." His eyes locked onto mine, his gaze so intense that it was almost hypnotic. "I won't be long."

"Okay." I watched Joker go into my bathroom and exhaled. I needed to calm myself so that I could think. 

I fired up the stovetop and took out bread, cheese, butter, and a small can of tomato soup. Comfort food would be good for him right now, and a grilled cheese sandwich with warm soup should do the trick. I buttered two pieces of bread and pressed a couple of cheese slices in between them, then set the sandwich on the skillet and watched it sizzle.

Did he even like grilled cheese?

_What in the hell am I doing?_

I was cooking dinner for a mental patient. An escaped mental patient, who was hiding out in my apartment. 

"Christ." I grabbed the can opener and began preparing the soup, shaking my head at my own trepidation.

_I'm doing the right thing. I'm protecting the man who killed the bastards who attacked me and my best friend._

_He's a murderer._

_He's beautiful._

I stirred the soup, adding some garlic salt and Italian seasoning. Joker - Arthur? - hadn't mentioned any allergies, so I figured I was safe in my choices. After flipping the sandwich, another thought occurred to me.

_Where is he going to sleep? I can't just keep him in that small room behind the closet. Unless he'd prefer that?_

_Or should I offer him my bed?_

The soup began to bubble and I quickly turned off the burners, setting up the food on the dinner table with a glass of water. 

_Maybe I could try to sleep in Jade's room while he slept in my room..._

A frantic knock at the door nearly made me jump out of my skin. "Sadie! Sadie! It's Bane!"

"Shit." I ran to the front door, staring out at the peephole. Bane stood in the hallway, grinning like mad.

I whirled around, but the bathroom door remained closed, and the apartment was silent except for the television. 

"Bane. Hey." I cleared my throat. "I, um, just finished a shower, I'm not dressed. What's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong, but Sadie! Did you hear? He got out! He actually got out!" Bane laughed, sounding utterly delighted.

"Yeah, I saw it on the news. Pretty crazy."

"The cops came to my apartment. Did they come to yours?"

"They did, but they left pretty quickly. Um, Bane, I'm kind of tired, I'm going to go to sleep."

"Oh shit, I'm sorry. I just wanted to check on you and make sure you heard the good news. I'll talk to you later, okay?"

"Of course. Goodnight, Bane."

"Night!" I listened as his heavy footsteps echoed through the hallway, and the elevator chimed as he entered and headed back to his floor.

The bathroom door opened, and Joker emerged dressed in the sweatpants and shirt, holding onto his Arkham Asylum uniform. He glanced at the front door and raised an eyebrow. "Friend of yours?"

"Yeah, that was Bane - the guy who works at the club. He's glad you're out...he's a big fan."

"Good to know." Joker gestured at the uniform. "Where should I...?"

"Here, let me. I'll wash them tomorrow." I stepped forward to take the clothes, but stopped abruptly when Joker placed his hand over mine. 

"Are you planning on letting me stay tomorrow as well?" he asked, eyeing me carefully. 

I nodded. "I wouldn't just...kick you out. Stay as long as you need to."

He grinned, then sniffed. "Hmm. Something smells delicious."

"Oh! Um, yeah. Here." I took the uniform and pointed to the kitchen. "I made some food. Help yourself, I'm going to take a shower. Then...then we both need to get some sleep."

"Sleep," He repeated, then glanced at my chest and frowned. "Did you hurt yourself?"

I looked down and saw that I'd managed to spill a bit of tomato soup on myself. "Ugh. No, it's soup. I'm an idiot, sorry." I sighed and without thinking, pulled the sash on my robe, slipping it from my shoulders. 

Joker breathed in deeply, his eyes widening as he looked me over. 

_Oh._

I'd never removed my dancing outfit. My breasts were practically spilling out of my push up top, and the bottom piece was tiny, not leaving much to the imagination.

Taking off my clothes at the club didn't phase me - it was work. But now I felt naked, my body on full display as Joker's lustful gaze weighed heavily on me. 

I stared back at him, waiting for his reaction. His hair was still wet from his shower, with damp wavy strands dripping onto his shoulders. I watched as his hands twitched at his sides, and his lips curled into a smile. 

"Fuck," he breathed, and started laughing like mad, his entire body shaking. 

"Oh god. Shit, I'm sorry." My face burned as I dropped the robe and hastily bent down to pick it up with the other clothes. "I'd just finished working, and...um. Haven't changed yet."

"I'm... I'm not laughing at you." Joker ducked his head as his giggling died down. "I have a...condition."

"I know. Pseudobulbar affect," I murmured, then winced. If I kept running my mouth, he'd realize how infatuated I was with him. The last thing I should do was set him on edge.

"Sorry." Joker ran his hand through his hair again and looked up at me, his gaze playful. "It's just very apparent to me that today is definitely my lucky day." 

I burst into sudden laughter, the surge of relief making me feel light-headed. "I feel the same way," I confessed, and bit my lip to keep from blurting again.

His mouth opened a bit and he blinked, all traces of darkness gone. For the first time I saw the man underneath the Joker - Arthur Fleck. A lonely, misunderstood outcast.

I cleared my throat. "So, uh. Go on and eat. I'll be out soon." I turned and headed to my bedroom, hearing him murmur to himself as he watched me walk away.

As I got to my bedroom, I leaned against the door and slowly exhaled, clutching the clothes to my chest. 

_Stay calm. You don't want to startle him. Pull yourself together._

Shaking my head, I threw the clothes into the hamper and headed to the bathroom. I needed a shower, then I needed sleep. Tomorrow, we'd work out a plan. 

The hot spray of water nearly made me groan. My body still ached from work, plus the Joker himself was in my apartment, had just seen most of my body and definitely approved. His gaze had my body aching in all sorts of other ways. 

I bit my lip and leaned against the cool tile, letting my hands wander. He'd been in this same space just moments ago, naked and wet.

My fingers ran over the swell of my breasts, circling my nipples until they grew hard. Mist fogged my vision, allowing me to imagine feeling Joker's hands instead of my own, smiling knowingly at me as he teased me.

_"Do you want me to keep touching you?"_

"Yes," I whispered, and shivered as my hand moved down my stomach, then lower, reaching in between my legs. 

_Please...please touch me..._

_"Like this?"_

I clamped my other hand over my mouth as my fingers pushed deep inside me, my palm pressing hard against my clit. My pulse throbbed as I imagined his hand on me, pushing his fingers deep, wanting me to come...

_Wait. _

_Wait. Calm down._

Slowly I exhaled, letting my hands drop to my sides. I had to keep my cool, for both of us. Everything that I knew about Joker, and Arthur Fleck, was that he was a loner, who had lived with his mother all his life. The other clowns at Ha-Ha's said he'd never mentioned having a girlfriend, ever. He might even be a virgin. 

I cursed myself and turned the shower dial to cool my body down. Getting us both worked up wouldn't help anything. I had to be Joker's friend right now. My desire could wait... forever, if need be. 

Joker was more important. 

After I got cleaned up, I wrapped a towel around myself and hurried into my room, rifling through my clothes until I found loose pajama pants and a plain black t-shirt. It was tight, but at least it wasn't see through. 

I put my wet hair up and took a few deep breaths, then headed back into the kitchen to join him.


	4. I Am Not Myself

}} I Am Not Myself {{

When I got to the kitchen table, Joker was leaning back in his chair, the food and most of the water gone. He saw me approaching and grinned. "Hello."

"Hi." I sat across from him and smiled. "I was hoping you'd like it."

He laughed softly and lifted his hand to his mouth, licking his finger. "You know what's funny?" Joker leaned forward to run his finger over the plate, gathering crumbs. "I never really ate much at home," he continued quietly. "And the food at the prison, and in Arkham...it's awful. So I didn't eat much. But now..." He brought his finger to his mouth and ran it over his tongue, staring at me. I watched, speechless, as he swallowed and smirked. "Now I'm ravenous."

Sudden nervous laughter burst out of me, and I gripped the sides of my chair to steady myself. "I'm glad. Do you want anything for dessert, or...?"

He cocked his head and gave me a curious smile. "Did you have something in mind?"

My fingers tightened against my chair's cheap upholstery. "Well. I have ice cream in the freezer. Neapolitan."

Joker chuckled. "When I was a kid, I'd eat the vanilla first, then the strawberry, then the chocolate. Then I'd scoop some of all three..." 

"And mix it together." I beamed at him. "I did the same thing. The other kids used to tease me about it. But to be fair, I've been teased my whole life. In every school I ever went to, I was one of the freaks."

"Huh." Joker folded his arms and stared at me. "I wouldn't have guessed you were the kind of person who's ever been picked on."

I huffed out a bitter laugh and got up, heading to the fridge to take out the carton of ice cream. "Big time. My mom died when I was six. Plane crash. Never knew my dad. So, I was in foster care after that, kept moving around...I didn't have many friends. Most of the girls thought I was a stuck up bitch, but I was just shy, and would rather read a book than talk to them. I hung out with the other weirdos at school, but didn't really have a friend until high school. Jade." I smiled to myself, scooping ice cream into two bowls. "She was in foster care too. We'd had some good families, but the ones we were placed with at the time didn't seem to like us all that much. Once we turned eighteen, we ran off to Gotham. I'd gotten pretty decent grades in school. Gotham University has a lot of programs, and the design school here is pretty well regarded too. Jade and I figured we'd make some money to save up for school, but they kept raising tuition, so..." I set down the bowls of ice cream and two spoons. "So I guess I figured I'd just keep dancing. I don't mind it. But I don't really know what else I should do." 

"What do you _want_ to do?" 

I shrugged and swirled my spoon around the bowl. "I'm not sure. I haven't found something that really makes me happy."

We ate our ice cream in silence, then I heard something; a quiet muttering, like chanting.

Joker was singing, very softly.

"You're riding high in April, shot down in May...but I know I'm gonna change that tune...when I'm back on top, back on top in June."

I couldn't stop the grin that spread across my face. Here he was, sitting in my kitchen, singing the same song that had always played at the end of Murray Franklin's show. It gave me a delicious thrill, knowing he was here, safe with me, as the world outside was tearing itself apart looking for him.

"That's life, and as funny as it may seem..."

"...Some people get their kicks stomping on a dream," I continued, my heart leaping when his eyes widened a bit. His surprised smile was the most achingly beautiful thing I'd ever seen.

"But I don't let it get me down," he murmured, and raised an eyebrow. 

"'Cause this fine old world, it keeps spinnin' around," I sang, and jumped to my feet. "Hold that thought!"

Feeling equal parts foolish and giddy, I hurriedly rushed to my record player. I'd gotten the Frank Sinatra album soon after Joker's fateful appearance on Murray's show, and often played it to soothe myself. I'd just set the needle down when I heard Joker get up from his chair.

I bit my lip as he walked closer. Was he going to ask me to shut it off? Was I being too much of a lovesick fan?

"Come here."

My blood rushed in my ears as I turned, breathless when Joker grinned and reached for me. He pulled me close, wrapped an arm around me and took my hand in his, swaying slowly as the music began. 

I giggled and held onto him as we danced, the organ music filling the living room. On the television, footage of his trial played along with scenes from tonight's protests. 

"You're an excellent dancer." He smiled as he twirled me around, then guided me back into his arms. 

"So are you." Every inch of my skin was tingling at his touch, his closeness. "I've missed dancing like this."

His smile faded. "Boyfriend?"

"Oh! God no. Not in years, and never anything serious. No, I used to take ballroom dancing lessons. Back when I was fourteen...my foster mom thought it would make me more..." I shrugged. "Presentable, I guess? I liked it, but I had to stop."

"Did she make you?" Joker asked, giving me another playful twirl. 

"No. But there were a lot of older guys there, taking lessons because their wives made them, and they always wanted to dance with me. They'd try to cop a feel, and one time a guy actually did, so I stomped on his foot. Broke some toes, got kicked out."

"Hmm." He squinted at me. "So, you left ballroom dancing because of the creeps, and became...an exotic dancer, to better avoid creeps?" 

I began to giggle, but then Joker pulled me even closer, letting me wrap my arms around his neck. He hummed and stroked my back, nuzzling against my neck. 

The television droned on in the background, and the music played on, but all I could hear was my heart pounding a maddening beat as Joker leaned in, his lips close to my ear. "I thought of quitting, baby," he whispered. "But my heart just ain't gonna buy it."

My grip on him tightened as I drew in a sharp breath. He was seducing me. He wanted me. 

This was real. 

Our dancing stopped, and he drew back slightly, gazing at me in wonder. Joker rested his hand on my cheek, running his thumb over my lips. I shivered, and let out a small moan when he slipped his thumb past my lips, gently rubbing the tip of my tongue. His gaze lowered to my mouth, and leaned close.

Just as his lips brushed against mine, a police siren wailed, making me jump. I gasped and clung to him, and he held me, laughing softly. 

"They won't get to us," he murmured, and rubbed my back. "It's all right."

I sighed. Here he was, hiding from the police, and he was comforting _me_. I seriously needed to get a grip. 

Carefully I let go and stepped back, trying to breathe deeply to calm myself. "We should get some rest." I cleared my throat. "You've been through a lot today. I shouldn't keep you up."

Joker raised an eyebrow, but said nothing. I realized the double meaning if what I'd just said and tried not to cringe. "You don't have to sleep. But, uh. You should rest. Lots to think about tomorrow."

"Mmm." He tilted his head and looked me over. "I suppose you're right."

A thought occurred to me. "The protesters who let you out...are they going to try to contact you? Do you have a plan?"

He chuckled and stretched, giving me a lazy, affectionate smile. "Do I look like a guy with a plan?"

"So...no need to leave here, then," I suggested, my pulse kicking up. "You could stay as long as you wanted."

Joker shook his head and chuckled to himself. He looked up at me, his eyes searching. "Are you real?"

Without hesitation, I reached my hand out to him. "I'm real. Flesh and bone, and blood." 

His hand reached out to mine, touching our fingertips together and sliding his hand down to caress my palm. "Good," he murmured. 

Another police siren made me jump, and I hurried into the living room to peek outside. A dizzying array of red and blue flashing lights lit up uptown Gotham, where the restless elite was probably demanding more police presence. I turned to the television, where a reporter was stating that countless sightings of the Joker were reported from residences near the courthouse, Monarch Theater, and even Wayne Manor. Either paranoid rich people were seeing him everywhere, or the protesters were throwing the Gotham police off Joker's trail. Either way, this was good news for us.

I grinned and turned to Joker, but he was already heading to the closet. "Wait. Where are you going?"

He stopped short, then turned to me, arching an eyebrow. "Wonderland."

"You don't have to sleep there. I've tried it, it's not that comfortable." I grit my teeth together to try to stop from babbling. "We'll just save Wonderland for when you need to hide."

"Hmm." Joker ran his fingers through his hair and eyed the couch. "Then..."

"No way. You deserve a decent bed, and decent sleep." I folded my arms, trying to hide how my hands were shaking. "Take my room. I'll sleep in Jade's. It'll be fine."

He stared at me, his mouth quirking up into a grin. "You want me to sleep in your bed?"

I shrugged, hoping I seemed nonchalant. "Why not?"

Joker burst into manic laughter. I cringed as it filled the room, and wondered if I should turn up the volume on the TV to drown it out. The walls of our building were cement, and you could hardly hear a thing, but I didn't want to chance it. 

I quickly moved forward to guide him gently into my room, my eyes darting around to make sure I didn't have anything that could humiliate me. While he was hunched over, his body wracked with hysterical laughter, I spotted a few clippings of newspaper articles about Joker on my bedside table. Somehow I managed to hide them in my sock drawer before he could notice, and watched him as he curled up on my bed, his laughter easing into slight snickering. If he decided to go through my things and find the articles...so be it.

Joker began to breathe normally and looked around my room, smiling to himself. "This is really nice."

I blushed, but I knew it wasn't anything special. Most of my artwork and furniture was from Burnside Consignment, so my walls were covered with old movie posters and reprints of classic art paintings. It was comfortable, but not really me - I never really got around to adding personal touches.

"Thank you." I tried not to concentrate on the fact that the Joker himself was in my bed - a fantasy I'd had for months - and gestured around the room. "Make yourself at home. If you hear anybody besides me, just remember that Wonderland is close by."

"And so are you." Joker eyed me, his gaze briefly wandering to my chest. 

"That's right." My own gaze wandered, and I bit my lip. Those sweatpants didn't leave much to the imagination, and he was definitely bigger than average.

_Slow down. He needs his rest._

I managed to look away and fiddled with the lamp on my end table. "Yeah, and. Um. Just let me know if you need anything. We'll get things figured out tomorrow."

"Thank you, Sadie." Joker grinned at me, and stretched. "You're very generous."

"Mmm." I eyed his body and forced myself to turn away. We were definitely flirting earlier, and he might even wanted me to join him in bed, but I had to focus. If I let my adoration for him overshadow my concentration, it could lead to disaster for both of us. "Goodnight. Sleep well."

With that, I turned, feeling his gaze follow me as I left the room.


	5. Curiouser and Curiouser

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Love that Joker ;)

}} Curiouser and Curiouser {{

_"...With guards outside Wayne Manor. Again, if you have any information on the possible whereabouts of Arthur Fleck, also known as Joker..."_

I rolled my eyes and shut the TV off. The ice cream was still on the counter, where we'd left it once we began to dance. After turning off the lights except for the one over the oven, I put the ice cream carton in the freezer, then placed the empty bowls in the sink. I'd take care of cleaning up the kitchen tomorrow. 

The apartment building was fairly quiet, with the soft sound of televisions and water running through the old pipes. Downtown Gotham didn't work itself into a panicked frenzy over Joker's escape. We would keep trying to survive, either silently rooting for him or loudly shouting our support for someone who was willing to give a giant "fuck you" to the rich assholes like Thomas Wayne. 

To be careful, though, I was going to keep the blinds closed tonight. I lived was pretty high up on the 10th floor, and the Ducard Apartments building was the tallest around for miles. Maybe in a few days I could let the sun in a bit, but that wasn't a priority.

The important thing was to keep Joker safe.

A slight chill at my back snapped me back to reality. My hair was still wet from my shower, and was dripping onto my back. 

I sighed and went to Jade's room. It was just as she left it - organized, beautiful, and brilliant. Her dream house sketches hung in bright, ornate frames all over the walls. Over her desk was a string of Christmas lights with pictures of us and buildings in uptown Gotham clothespinned between the tiny bulbs. 

If Joker could sleep in my room, I could sleep here. It would be fine. 

In her bathroom, I peeled off my shirt and wrapped my hair in a towel, then settled into bed. My heart was still racing from the intensity of Joker's stare and the curious sensuality of his touch.

What had happened earlier? Did he actually want me or was he just grateful?

I groaned and rolled on my side, pulling the covers over my chest. 

_You're harboring a fugitive._

_You both need your rest. Tomorrow, you have to plan._

_But you need to rest._

Eventually the day's events caught up to me, and my eyes grew heavy as I finally succumbed to sleep.

~~~}}{{~~~

_What the hell?_

_I'm not in my room...I'm in Jade's room...her bed. Why...?_

Everything came back in a rush. The Wall Street Three. Jade's death.

Joker.

A quiet, playful knock nearly made me jump out of my skin.

I sat up, my hair spilling out of the towel. "I'm awake," I announced, then scrambled to pull up the sheets when I realized that I'd fallen asleep without a shirt. I'd just managed to cover myself when Joker peered into the room. 

"Hello," he murmured, his gaze intense but undecipherable.

"Hi." I gestured to myself. "Sorry, I'm not dressed."

Joker raised an eyebrow, then turned and walked away. When I heard the TV click on, I leapt out of bed and ran to Jade's closet for a shirt. I didn't want to wear the other regular shirt that her ex had left, in case Joker wanted to change, but I needed something that I could wear around him that would make us both comfortable. Briefly I considered just wrapping a towel around myself and finding something in my room, but most of my clothes were dirty. This was the only real option.

"C'mon, Jade," I whispered, shoving aside her dancing outfits and revealing nightclub clothes. Finally I found a bright, fairly garrish Velvet Lounge shirt that was kind of casual, albeit a little low cut and a size smaller than what I was used to wearing. Jade used to call me a D cup diva, and would probably be chuckling at my current predicament right now, but I had no other real choices. I squeezed the shirt over myself and sighed. If Joker was uncomfortable with my clothes, I could always throw on a hoodie. 

Joker was sitting on the couch, leaning forward with his elbows resting on his knees. "There's been a development," he informed me, and I stopped short.

"What?" I whispered, my mind racing. Had one of my neighbors seen or heard something? Bane probably had no idea. Was it that creepy cop? Did he see or hear something?

"Mmhmm." Joker pointed to the television. "According to numerous reports, I have been seen around Wayne Manor several times now, clearly canvassing the area." 

I let out a sigh. "You scared me."

"Ah, I'm sorry." He leaned back on the couch, stretching. "That bed of yours is lovely, Sadie. I slept very well." 

"Good." I felt rooted to the spot, unsure of whether I should join him on the couch or start making breakfast. "So, are you hungry, or...?"

He tilted his head to look at me. "Hungry?" His eyes widened a bit as he glanced down at my chest, then lifted his gaze to my eyes. "Mmm."

"Great," I blurted, feeling light headed. "So. Yes. I have food, and I'll make it. Something sweet."

"Something sweet," he repeated, his eyes traveling from my legs back up to my breasts. "Sounds great."

I bit my lip to keep from giggling like an idiot, and went to the kitchen to take out a tube of refrigerated cinnamon rolls and turned the oven on. 

"Got any cigarettes?" Joker asked from the living room as I got the cinnamon rolls ready. "I only had the one yesterday."

"I do, actually...just a sec." After putting the food in the oven, I set the timer and went to my room to grab the cigarettes and lighter from my sock drawer. I'd hidden them away when I started chain smoking after the horrible night with the Wall Street Three. 

It took a little while, but after rummaging through socks, tights, and stockings, I found a mostly empty pack and a lighter. Something occurred to me, and I looked further back, where I'd hidden the Joker article clippings that I'd collected.

Nothing was disturbed - he hadn't gone through anything. I hadn't expected him to, but it was still soothing to see proof. 

When I got back to the living room, Joker was lying across the couch, watching me with a grin.

I handed him the pack and lighter, trying to keep my voice steady as he took them from me and brushed his fingers against my hand. "I'll get more today, and other supplies."

He took out a cigarette and placed it in his mouth, gazing up at me as he brought the lighter closer to him. "Thanks." 

"You're welcome." I ran my hand through my hair, unsure of what to do. "So, yeah. I'm going out shopping later, and I'll get you more clothes, cigarettes..."

Joker sat up, exhaling smoke as he glanced up at me. "Are you sure you want to do this?"

I frowned. "It's no trouble, I'm off for a few days..."

He shook his head and took another drag, focusing his attention back to the television. "They'll be looking for someone suddenly buying men's clothes. You live alone, no boyfriend. Might look suspicious."

"I thought of that, but I have an idea." I sat next to him and took a deep breath. "I'll be getting all sorts of clothes, for men, women, kids. We'll be getting into fall soon, so I can tell people that I'm making donations for the cold weather that's coming. Jade and I have done it before, so it won't seem weird. Plus I'll actually donate the other stuff, and anything that I get that you don't want."

Joker kept his gaze on the television. "It's gonna cost a lot of money."

"I have a lot saved. It'll be fine. Plus this way I can donate some of Jade's clothes. Her stuff doesn't really fit me." I gestured to myself, my face burning as he looked at me and grinned knowingly. "I mean, she has a lot of stuff, and I don't need to keep it."

"Mmm." Joker glanced at my chest and took a long, slow drag on his cigarette. "That her shirt?"

I nodded, my feeling my mind short circuit when he looked directly into my eyes and gave me a playful smile.

"You should keep it. Looks really good." He winked, then let his gaze lower, and raised an eyebrow. "What does your tattoo say?" 

My throat suddenly went dry. "It's...it's the Mad Hatter. And um...a quote that I added to it."

Joker glanced at me, then back at my hip. "Hmm."

_Screw it. Might as well come clean._ "Do you want to see it?" 

He smirked, took another drag on his cigarette, then exhaled and nodded. "I do."

I nodded, then sightly leaned away to better display the tattoo, carefully easing down the waistband of my pajama pants.

The couch slightly creaked as he moved closer, bending down to read it. A few moments passed, and I froze, dread tightening my chest as I awaited his reaction. 

_What if he mocks me, or thinks I'm a stalker? _

_Oh god. Please make him want to stay..._

"Beautiful." He moved closer, his breath warming my skin. "May I?"

"Yes," I whispered, unsure of what I was agreeing to but not caring. Joker could do whatever he wanted to me.

I managed not to jump when he began tracing the tattoo with his fingertips, a feather light touch that nearly made me dizzy. 

"You get what you fucking deserve," he whispered, and leaned close, gently pressing his lips to my skin.

A small moan escaped me, and I drew in a shaking breath when I felt something soft and wet caress my hip.

_Oh god. His tongue._

My body responded with wetness of its own, and I pressed my thighs together to try to relieve the insistent beat of my pulse that I could feel between my legs. Joker noticed and chuckled softly as he continued to lick, tracing the ink patterns with the tip of his tongue.

The oven timer blared suddenly, making me curse and jump. Joker merely sat back and laughed, taking another drag on his cigarette. 

I nearly ran to the kitchen to turn everything off, and somehow took out the cinnamon rolls without dropping anything. The warm smells of cinnamon and sugar would normally drive me crazy with hunger, but now I wanted something else.

I wanted him. 

The television clicked off, and I took a deep breath to steady myself. 

_Holy shit. Holy shit, okay._

_He wants me too._

Still, I had to be careful. Joker might just be toying with me, looking for reactions. 

Best to play it safe. Let him take the lead.

As calmly as I could, I went back to the couch and sat next to him. "I'll, um, be heading out after breakfast. Did you have anything in mind that you'd like me to get? Is there something you really want?"

He burst into laughter and shook his head, taking another puff on his cigarette. 

I couldn't tell if it was a nervous reaction or if he wanted something and didn't want to admit it. "Drugs?" I asked carefully. "I have some grass. I could probably get just about anything, but I don't know if taking the hard stuff would be a good idea right now."

Joker snickered and handed me his cigarette. I took it and puffed on it, taking a few quick drags. 

"I don't want drugs." He leaned back again, looking me over with that intense stare. "Do you know what I really want?"

I took another drag to steady myself and turned to the side table, stamping out the cigarette on the ashtray. Gathering all my courage, I turned back to him and smiled. "Name it."

Joker's lips spread into a wicked grin. "First, I want to kiss you. I want to taste your pretty little mouth, and I want to put my face between those big tits and those pretty legs of yours until you're begging me to fuck you, and then I want to fuck you so hard that you scream for me." He chuckled and ran his tongue over his teeth, watching for my reaction. 

My jaw dropped, but I was unable to speak. I shifted slightly on the couch, nearly shocked at how wet I felt - I was practically soaked. My nipples were achingly hard, pushing against my shirt and demanding attention. Joker looked at them and licked his lips, making me whimper and rub my thighs together in response. 

Every inch of my body was pulsating with desire, making me ache in a way that was almost painful. I'd never felt so aroused in my life. It was dizzying, almost frightening. 

"Hmm, no answer." Joker pretended to pout. "Is that a no, then? I can't have what I want?"

"Fuck yes, you can," I whispered, and leaned close to kiss him.

He laughed as he pulled me onto his lap, and kept laughing as our mouths met, his hands cupping and squeezing my ass as I moaned in response. I wiggled my hips eagerly, moaning again as I felt his hard length pressing insistently through his sweatpants. 

Our kiss deepened, and his hands ran through my hair and clutched my skull as his tongue explored my mouth. I stroked his hair, his face, his chest, but wanted more. My body was screaming for contact, skin on skin. 

I broke away from our kiss with a gasp, then pulled frantically at my shirt. Joker growled, then helped me lift it over my head and tossed it to the floor. His hands cupped and squeezed my breasts, and I shivered as he moved closer to kiss the space between them. He opened his mouth and licked at my skin, tilting his head to place his lips over my right nipple and began to suck.

"Oh, shit." I squirmed on his lap as he suckled greedily, his hard length brushing against my thighs. He moved to my left breast and sucked, humming against my skin when I ran my fingers through his hair. His vibrant green eyes looked up at me, and my heart pounded as his hands wandered down my back. 

"You're so beautiful," I whispered to him, rocking my hips as he moaned. I felt his hands slip under my pajama bottoms to grab my ass again, and I gasped as he thrust his hips up in time with mine. 

My hands wandered greedily to his waist, pulling insistently at the hem of his pants, and with a growl he lifted me up, then stood as well and took me by the hand. In a dizzying blur, we made our way to my room, and I found myself on my bed, staring up at a grinning Joker. He pulled his shirt off and nearly ripped my pajama bottoms off me, then rolled me on my side so he could kiss and lick at the tattoo that bore his words. 

"You get what you fucking deserve," Joker growled, and sunk his teeth into my skin, making my cry out in pleasure and pain. "Mmm. I think you deserve a reward. You've been such a good girl, taking such good care of me." He pushed me on my back and settled between my legs, hooking his arms around my hips. "Look at you. So pretty," he whispered, his breath warming my thighs. Joker inhaled deeply and groaned, moving even closer. "Fuck, you smell good. I'll bet you taste even better." He laughed softly as I jumped slightly at his words and the feel of his breath against me. "Hmm...let's find out, shall we?"

My jaw dropped as he buried his face in between my legs, wriggling his tongue around eagerly. He licked around my entrance, then pushed his tongue deeper to explore inside me, making my eyes roll back as I felt the tip of his tongue curl against my inner walls. I tried to remember how to breathe as he grunted and pulled me closer against him, his nails digging into my hips as if he was warning me not to move away. 

With the way he was making my body respond, there was no way in hell that was happening.

I could feel myself getting close to orgasm already, the knowledge that Joker was between my legs, tasting me and apparently _loving_ it, but when he widened his mouth to cover my clit and began licking at it, letting my wetness drip all over his chin, I gasped and buried my hands in his hair. Joker chuckled against me, then growled when the sensation made me squeal. He was almost frantic, licking and sucking with abandon as I gasped for air. My hands shook in his hair, whimpering helplessly. Joker darted his tongue rapidly against my clit, then closed his mouth around my it and began to suck, then shook his head rapidly back and forth.

My entire body began shaking, then I arched my back and screamed as my orgasm took over. He grunted and snarled, licking and sucking hard, reaching up to squeeze my breasts as I convulsed with pleasure. Joker was relentless, moving his face rapidly when he saw that I was recovering, sending another wave of pleasure through me.

"Holy shit. Holy shit....oh god. Please...oh, _fuck_." I desperately grabbed a pillow to scream into it when he pushed two or three fingers into me, curling them inside me while he rubbed my clit with his tongue. My hips jolted up, then my body seized and clamped around his fingers as I came a third and fourth time. 

By the time he pulled away, I was gasping for air and shaking. Joker chuckled as he caressed my sides. "Shhh, steady there...I'm not done with you yet. Shhh..."

I mumbled incoherently and carefully lifted my leg to rub his cock, which was straining against his sweatpants and showing his impressive size. My body was already exhausted with pleasure, but I needed more. 

"Hmm?" He placed my foot against the bed, spreading my legs and moving closer. "Do you want something?"

"Fuck me," I moaned, lifted my hips and stretched, offering myself to him. 

He watched me and laughed softly, then ran his hands over my body in a purely possessive way that made me whimper. "Ask me nicely," he murmured.

"Please." I begged, nearly writhing in desperation. All my pride was gone, all my rage, everything. All I wanted was him, and I'd be complete. I needed him more than air. "Please, please fuck me, I need it, I'll do anything, please..."

He stood up suddenly, pulling off his sweatpants and crawling naked onto the bed, leaning over me. 

"Yes, yes, please..." I reached up to caress his face as he bent down to kiss me. I could taste myself on his tongue and I moaned, wrapping my legs around his waist. He broke our kiss, resting his forehead against mine with a soft groan.

"Sadie," he whispered, and in that moment, he was Arthur Fleck again, a nervous, lonely man. 

"I adore you," I whispered, stroking his face and smiling when he stared at me, his eyes searching mine. I gently brushed his hair away from his face and smiled, tilting my hips up to brush my entrance against him.

He breathed in sharply, his gaze intensifying when I reached down to explore the tip of his cock, humming as a few drops of precum gathered on my fingertips. I traced invisible patterns on his long, thick length, to soothe and tantalize him and to relieve my curiosity. His cock bobbed eagerly when at my touch, and a few more drops of precum dripped onto my hand. 

Arthur watched, wide eyed as I brought my hand up my mouth and licked, moaning at his taste. "Fuck," he muttered, and I grinned.

"I want you." I kissed him, and gently stroked his hair, gazing at him as he stared down at me. _So beautiful._

"Promise me that you're real," he whispered. 

"I swear it." I gasped as he positioned himself against me, the head of his cock nudging at my entrance. My nails dug into his shoulders, and he chuckled.

"I feel that. God, you're actually real." He grinned, then moved his hips forward and let out a shaking breath when he slipped a few inches inside me. "Oh, fuck...you're so wet. So warm."

Already I could feel a familiar ache inside me, which only grew as he pushed further inside. The stretch was nearly overwhelming; I hadn't had sex in a while, and Joker was certainly longer and thicker than any other guy I'd been with. When he pushed all the way inside me, I could feel the tip of his cock poke teasingly at my cervix, and my body seized.

"Oh god, oh fuck!" I clutched at him as I came, writhing as my inner walls clamped down around him. His nails dug into my hips and he growled into my neck, his body beginning a steady, desperate rhythm. 

I held onto him for dear life, moaning and gasping as he fucked me, his hips pushing insistently against mine. Joker's hands wandered as he moved, squeezing my breasts and pushing my hips down to meet his thrusts. 

My eyes rolled with the intensity of his movements and the overwhelming feel of him inside me. The bed slammed against the wall, and a tiny corner of my mind that could still manage coherent thought worried about the noise we were making, but then an obviously irritated neighbor began blasting Black Sabbath. The music almost drowned out our noise, but Joker was grunting in my ear, cursing at and nearly snarling. It was so primal that it made me dizzy. 

Joker was a man possessed. I had never been fucked like this in my life, and my body was jolting and shaking with back to back orgasms as he slammed into me. My hands clutched at his back and his skull as he drove into me, my breaths reduced to desperate gasps. I could feel every inch of him claiming me - the stretch of his length, pushing into me like a repeated demand, my body taking him in eagerly. 

"Fuck...fuck!" Joker suddenly sank his teeth into my neck and pushed into me as deep and hard as he could. My legs shook as I screamed, succumbing to the most intense orgasm of my life. He relaxed his jaw and moaned, his cock jerking inside me as he came. I gasped at the sudden warmth inside me, burying my hands in his hair as he rested his forehead on my shoulder and breathed heavily.

I shivered, wrapping my arms around Joker as he placed his hands on my hips, giving me a few slow, final thrusts before he slowly pulled out. We groaned and he collapsed onto his back, both of us staring at the ceiling as we tried to breathe normally.

The neighbor seemed to realize that we were done and lowered the volume when the next song started. I glanced at Joker, who was still staring at the ceiling, his expression calm but unreadable. I moved slightly, wincing at the full ache inside. Damn, he was big. It would take some getting used to.

The thought of having sex with him again caused a little jolt of excitement in my chest, but I ignored it for now.

I carefully turned on my side and looked at him. "Are you okay?"

He turned on his side to face me, his eyes searching me so intently that it took my breath away. "Yeah."

I smiled. "Good."

Joker turned and stretched, exhaling slowly and staring at the ceiling. "Well. That was definitely an experience."

I looked at him, studying every line and curve of his face. He was remarkably beautiful. "Was that your first time?" I asked carefully, resting my hand over his heart. 

He kept his gaze on the ceiling and nodded. 

Trying to ignore the gentle fluttering in my chest, I moved closer and pressed a soft kiss to his forehead and both his cheeks. "You were incredible," I whispered, placing a light kiss to his lips. "Perfect. So perfect." 

A slow, lazy smile spread on his face, and that burst of emotion in my chest returned. 

The neighbor began singing along to the next song, his faint off key vocals seeming louder than necessary. Joker huffed, and suddenly the memory of him taunting the audience of Murray Franklin's show about his murders came to me, clear and sharp as glass, and I began to giggle.

Joker smirked and put an arm around me, pulling me close. "Something funny?"

I bit my lip. "They couldn’t carry a tune to save their lives," I quoted.

Joker's eyes widened, then he began to laugh hysterically. I joined him, both of us nearly screaming with laughter as the music was turned up again, still unable to silence us.


	6. Any Sort of Smile

}} Any Sort of Smile {{

Crumbs and icing were everywhere - on our skin, the bed, even the pillows. I'd have to throw the sheets in the wash, and we both needed a shower. We'd fed each other breakfast in bed, occasionally dipping our fingers into the icing and spreading it on each other, licking it off with soft moans and laughter. After we finished eating, Joker lit another cigarette, and I leaned forward to take a small drag every few minutes. Smoke filled the room as I nuzzled against his shoulder, grinning as he stroked my back lazily and possessively.

I'd never been happier. 

"I'm glad you're here," I told him, gently rubbing his stomach.

He chuckled, then sat up, stamping out his cigarette on the ashtray on the night table. "Come here."

I grinned and eagerly scooted close, giggling slightly when he pulled me into his lap. Joker kissed my forehead, then eased me onto his chest, wrapping his arms around my waist.

"You know what's funny?" he murmured into my hair as I sighed and snuggled close. "Right now, I'd be meeting with Dr. O'Neil, who would try to get me to talk about my childhood. Then, after lunch, Dr. Novick would come in and try to make me feel _empathy._" Joker's voice went up in a mocking tone at the word. "It is very important to him that I reflect on the people I hurt, including little Bruce Wayne. And the whole time, I'd just laugh at them." 

I smiled. "I love your laugh."

"Mmm. They, on the other hand, did not seem to care for it." He snickered as I burst into laughter, burying my face in his chest. 

"You're amazing." I closed my eyes as he caressed my hair, feeling more at peace than I ever had before. 

_Bliss._

Joker looked down and made an inquiring noise. "You have another tattoo."

"Oh! Yeah, I do." I sat up, moving my hair to the side, shivering a bit when he sat forward, letting his fingers dance from my neck to my right shoulder. 

"Put on a happy face..." He leaned forward and kissed the words, his hair gently brushing against my skin. "I sense a pattern."

A rush of heat rose to my skin. "I really like you," I whispered. 

"I can tell." Joker nuzzled against my back, an almost feline gesture. His hands wandered, stroking my hips and traveling up to cup and squeeze my breasts, then back to my hips to pull me onto his lap again. He wrapped his arms around my waist, then slowly sunk his teeth into my neck, making me gasp and squirm. "I like you too," he breathed into my ear. 

_Fuck._ I let out a shaking breath when I felt his cock begin to twitch under my thighs. While I was definitely interested in more sex, there was something else that I wanted to do. "You know...I really, really enjoyed that reward you gave me earlier," I told him, turning my head to give him a playful smile. 

He grinned and ran his tongue over his teeth. "Did you, now?"

"Mmhmm. I'm thinking you need a reward too." I turned around and moved up, settling next to him as he laid back against the pillows. "You did escape, after all."

"I had some help." Joker watched as I reached down to stroke him, and lifted his hips. "Oh, fuck..."

I smirked, keeping my touches gentle and teasing. He wasn't fully hard yet, but he was getting there pretty quickly. "Who helped you?" I asked, wrapping my hand around him and slowly stroking him.

"Mmm. Some protesters and other prisoners...mostly Zsasz. He wanted to stick around, said he had more tallies to make." Joker sighed as my fingers traced gentle patterns against his cock. "Protesters got in somehow. It was... madness. Chaos. They got the keys...let me out of my cell."

"Did you have to kill anyone?" I asked carefully, moving my hand just a little faster.

Joker grunted and thrust into my grip. "A few guards," he muttered. "They tried to kill me. I was too fast for them."

"Mmm, you're a brave man," I kissed his forehead. "How did you do it?"

He moaned as I relaxed my grip, reaching down to fondle and rub his balls. "Shit. I...the first one...he tried to reach for his gun..." Joker exhaled as I moved my hand up again, gently gripping his cock and using my thumb to rub circles on his frenulum. "Fuck...mmm. I grabbed him and slammed his head against the wall. Took his gun...finished him off. Used the gun on the other two guards...dropped it when I was out of the building."

"Hmm." I let him go and reached between my legs to gather the wetness there, then wrapped my hand around him again and began a steady rhythm - up and down, up and down. "Sounds like I should get you a gun. Help keep you safe."

His eyes rolled and he drew in a few sharp breaths as his cock jerked in my hand, now almost completely hard.

"Maybe some knives too," I murmured, rubbing my foot against his leg. "Get you some toys."

"Mmm." Joker closed his eyes and mumbled under his breath when I moved down, letting his cock slide between my breasts as I kissed his chest.

"You're so brave." I pressed my lips to his stomach, giving him a series of gentle kisses as I worked my way down. He opened his eyes and looked down at me, his jaw dropping slightly. I grinned and kept my eyes locked on his as I slid my tongue down his navel. "You've definitely earned a reward." My hands curled around the base of his cock and I slipped my lips over his head, watching as his eyes grew wide.

"Fuck." Joker grabbed at the sheets as I moved my head down his shaft, swirling my tongue around. His thighs flexed as my lips met my hands, fully engulfing him.

The head of his cock was thick, and I had to open my jaw fairly wide to accommodate him. My tongue was already coated with a generous amount of precum, and I swallowed, moaning at the taste.

"Holy shit." Joker began panting when I pressed my tongue against his cock, licking slow, lazy swipes against his head. The combination of his precum and my saliva made me swallow a few more times, then I let myself drool over him, getting him wet. His cock nudged against the roof of my mouth and I gently laughed, making Joker's eyes roll back and mutter something unintelligible.

After a couple more movements, I lifted my head, slipping him out of my mouth and kissing his tip. "I have a question," I said softly, my lips close enough to him so he could feel them stroke his shaft while I spoke.

Joker's grunted and lifted his hips to try to get himself back into my mouth.

I grinned against him and gave him a teasing lick. "I want you to come," I murmured, nuzzling against him. "I want you to come in my mouth, but I also want to feel you come on my tits. Which sounds better to you?"

Joker huffed out a laugh, raising his hips again. "Do I have to choose just one?"

"Good idea." My lips slid back down around him and he groaned. I kept my hands around his base, stroking and gently squeezing. My tongue curled around the head of his cock, then darted around rapidly as I bobbed my head, drooling onto him.

_"Unnh."_ Joker's hands rested on my head, his fingers in my hair as I kept sucking on him. He didn't push, pull, or do anything forceful, but held onto me like he was afraid I was going to pull away. 

No way in hell was I going to stop this, not by the way he was gasping and moaning. 

My mouth was full of cock and precum - he was so wet that there was enough to drip from my lips down his shaft as I moved and sucked. His hips began shaking and his fingers twitched against my scalp. He was close.

I moved slightly, shifting my knees closer to get ready for his orgasm. He wanted to come in me, and on me, and I wanted the same thing. I kept up my pace, my jaw starting to ache from accommodating his size.

I didn't have to wait long. Joker let out a guttural shout and his hips lifted as his cock began to jerk inside my mouth, coating my tongue with his warm release. I swallowed quickly, nearly whimpering at the taste and the knowledge that Joker himself was pumping his come in my mouth. He let out a cry and arched his back as I kept sucking, moaning around him and sending vibrations around his shaft. 

He spurted in my mouth one, two, three more times until I drew back and carefully angled his cock to point at my breasts. Joker nearly keened, his hips fully raised off the bed as I gently pumped him. Warm semen coated my chest and I sighed at the sensation. 

His body shook, and I carefully released him, watching as he lay on the bed, gasping for breath. I looked down at my chest and smiled, running a finger through a line of his release and bringing it to my mouth, sucking on it greedily.

"Fuck." Joker exhaled and stared at me. "You're fucking amazing."

"Mmm." I slipped my finger out of my mouth and grinned at him. "You're pretty damn fantastic yourself."

He huffed out a laugh and I lay next to him, rubbing my thighs together. Having him fuck my mouth and come down my throat and on my breasts had me more than ready to come as well. I was tempted to reach down and get myself off, but before I could, Joker turned to me with a grin. "Want to hear a joke?" 

My heart leapt. "Definitely."

Joker playfully lowered his hand between my legs, which I eagerly parted for him. He pressed his palm against me, making me sigh. "What did the broken clock say to the other broken clock?" he whispered.

I licked my lips and shivered. "Um...I...oh, fuck!" I grasped his arm in desperation when he curled his fingers to push inside me, pressing his thumb on my clit. 

He smirked, and began rubbing insistently against me. " 'Looks like you could use a hand'." His hand began moving rapidly, thrusting fingers into me while rubbing my clit. 

"Oh shit, oh my god..." He pushed a steady rhythm with his fingers, then suddenly curled them to stroke inside me. At the same time, he rubbed my clit faster with his thumb, and the pressure that I'd had building inside me suddenly broke.

I shrieked and writhed on the bed as I came, his hand continuing to move as I clenched around his fingers, my body almost burning with pleasure. Orgasms wracked through me, unrelenting as he was. Joker stared at me intently, almost frightening in his determination to keep making me orgasm. I mewled and pushed at his hand, nearly sobbing with oversensitivity. Mercifully he withdrew his hand and brought it up to his mouth, licking his palm and watching me as I tried to regain my breath. 

"That's it," he soothed, and carefully pulled me close, kissing my forehead and smoothing back my hair. "Breathe. It's all right...I'm here."

I mumbled nonsense and curled next to him, clinging like a child. "Stay," I pleaded softly. "Please. Stay here. I don't want to... without you..."

He smiled against my forehead and gave me another soft kiss. "I'm here. I belong with you." His fingers stroked my hair, pulling me closer. "We're going to change the world," he whispered.

I listened to his heart, beating so close to mine, and smiled.

~~~}}{{~~~

_Woman's blouse, green... boy's socks, two pairs...black pants, gray shirt, purple vest, red jacket for Joker..._

I hummed to myself as I added the clothes to my cart. I already had a pretty good haul, but I wanted to get enough to hide the clothes that I intended on keeping. Joker was skinny now, but I intended to keep him well fed, so I got the pants I thought he'd like in a couple of sizes. 

Soap, shampoo, and a new toothbrush were already in my cart, and I had plans for dinner. Tomorrow I could get more groceries, and maybe get some weapons for both of us.

_Us. He's mine now, and I'm his._

I nearly skipped down the aisle, smiling at the people who passed me, even the leering guys who looked at my breasts first. Nothing could wreck my good mood. After Joker had promised to stay, we showered together and kissed every inch of each other's bodies. We stripped the bed, changing the sheets and he went to hide in Wonderland after kissing me goodbye. 

It was like a dream.

Joker was safe in my locked apartment, and I was the only one with the key. The owner had moved recently and now ran the apartment building from Florida. Bane was the only other person who knew about Wonderland, but even if he ever suspected anything, he wouldn't tell anyone. 

No one else knew, so -

_Wait. No. That artist in the building, the one who painted Wonderland...he knows. _

_What if he says something to the cops when they can't find Joker weeks from now?_

Panic iced my veins, and my grip on the cart tightened. 

_Shit. Shit._ My mind raced to try to remember details about him. Jade had said that he lived on the third floor. I'd met him a few times, and thanked him for the paintings. He was a young guy, in his early twenties.

_What was his name...? Shit. He's a little odd, but polite. Likes to tell jokes...no, not jokes. Riddles. Name starts with an E._

_Ethan? Evan?_

_No...Ed._

I breathed deeply, trying to calm my nerves. This wasn't a crisis yet. I just needed to talk to Ed, get an idea of where he stood...and if he might be a problem...

_Maybe I should get weapons first. Just in case._

A guy turned the corner, saw me and paused. He looked me over, his eyes studying my legs and chest. 

_Ugh._ I turned to move past him, but he angled his cart to block me. Fear shot my heart rate up, but it quickly turned to anger. "Excuse me..."

"Hey there." He smirked. "Looks like you've got a lot of shopping done."

_No fucking shit, asshole._ "Yeah. Excuse me, I just need to get by...

"Need a hand?" he asked with a smirk, and glanced at my chest again. 

I gritted my teeth. "No. I just need to get by, so if you could just move..."

"Todd." He grinned and stepped forward. "I'm Todd."

"Bye, Todd." I grabbed his cart and shoved it away, then finally moved past him.

"What the fuck?" He ran up and stood in front of my cart, glaring. "I'm just trying to be nice, no need to be a bitch."

I scoffed. "You're being a jackass, and you need to leave me alone."

Todd glared at me. "Or what, sweetie? What the fuck are you going to do?"

_I'll get the Joker to crush your fucking skull open._ The thought and mental image of it made me burst into hysterical laughter.

Todd recoiled, but then snorted. "You low class assholes think you can act like that clown freak and the rest of us will run scared?"

Before I could reply that yes, that's exactly what I thought, a familiar voice made me turn. "Hey! I know that laugh!" Bane rounded the corner with a sweet grin that faded when he saw Todd. "Is there a problem?" 

Todd's skull was about the size of Bane's bicep. He seemed to notice this, and went pale and shook his head. "No, not at all..."

"This guy is a fucking douchebag," I informed Bane. "He tried to block me, then called me a bitch."

Bane's eyes grew wide with fury, but before he could move, Todd turned and actually ran, leaving his cart behind.

I watched him go and smirked. "Good timing, big guy."

Bane turned back to me and frowned. "I keep telling you, you need a switchblade or something. What if I wasn't here?"

"You're right." I nodded, making up my mind. "Tomorrow I'll go to Owl Court Weaponry, I'll get a knife, and a gun. For the apartment."

Bane nodded. "It would make me feel better. I was going to head there tomorrow, they're the only place I can get boots in my size. We can share a cab, if you want."

"That sounds great. You can help me pick out a gun. Or two," I added. Maybe one for me and for Joker. Couldn't hurt to be prepared...

"Sure." Bane looked at my cart. "Oh cool, you're donating again!"

"Yup. And I got other stuff. Needed a new toothbrush." I bit my tongue to stop babbling. "So. Um. What are you doing here? Besides looking out for me."

Bane shrugged. "I was bored, and I need more protein bars. Plus I needed a break from watching the news, they don't know shit about what's going on with the Joker. Which is good, of course. I don't want him to be caught." 

I grinned before I could stop myself. "No?"

"Of course not. He's a damn hero. He's what Gotham needs right now." Bane smirked. "And I know you feel the same way. I honestly don't know anyone who doesn't think that he's just what we've been needing for years."

I gestured at the abandoned cart. "Todd didn't seem to like him."

"Well, Todd better hope that I never see him again, or I'll break him in half." Bane cracked his knuckles. "See? This is what I mean. People like that need to be kept in line. Joker could help with that."

My heart soared at his words. I wanted to tell him everything, and assure him that Joker was safe, but we were in public. Tomorrow, maybe. I'd have to talk to Joker first about it. "I couldn't agree more, big guy. Now, let's get you those protein bars. Gotta keep you healthy."

~~~}}{{~~~

When we returned to our building, I had four full shopping bags full of clothes, one of which was all for Joker. Tonight I'd prepare the clothes that would actually get donated and see what Joker actually wanted to keep.

Bane helped me bring the bags to my apartment, and I'd made a show of making noise opening the door in case Joker decided to wander around in my absence. We'd briefly discussed having a secret knock, but then realized that there'd be no reason for me to knock on my own door, so I would have to be careful entering each time. It wasn't hard - the locks were loud, and Joker assured me that he could hear them in Wonderland when I'd opened and closed the door for the cops the other day. 

Luckily Bane didn't want to stick around, as he wanted to head to the gym, but before he left we made a plan to meet up tomorrow to buy weapons. 

While we were talking, I realized that Bane had met Ed as well, and might know more about him. I pretended to be interested to see about having him paint a mural in Jade's room to honor her - and as I said it, I actually liked the idea. When I asked him, Bane smiled. 

"I love that idea, and I think Ed would too. He's a good kid. Kind of strange, but the good kind, you know?" Bane paused. "He's working on something now, in his apartment. You could ask him about another mural, I've seen him a couple of times with his art supplies. He's probably painting as we speak."

I nodded, and pretended to wander aimlessly when in fact I was walking closer to the closet so Joker could hear me. "Great. I'll head to the third floor, then. Maybe talk to him and see what he thinks about... everything." 

"Cool, tell him I said hey." Bane walked out with me, telling me again that he was glad that I was getting weapons tomorrow and that I should also consider a stun gun. I agreed - this was going to be another big shopping trip. 

Bane got off at his floor and wished me a good night as I headed down to the third floor. I practiced my questioning, wanting to be able to determine Ed's loyalties without seeming suspicious. 

The elevator pinged as it opened, and the smell of paint fumes hit me immediately. Ed was definitely here. I stepped into the hall, looking around until I saw newspapers lining the floor around the open door to an apartment a few doors down. Faint classical music played as someone hummed along and occasionally talked to himself. 

I slowly made my way toward the open door, trying to remember the inane conversations that I'd had with Ed before. He didn't seem like the type to sympathize with police, but it wasn't out of the question. 

When I took another step and looked inside the apartment, my mind nearly reset itself. 

The living room had been transformed. It looked as though the wall had been smashed, pieces breaking away in puzzle shaped fragments to reveal a dark chasm underneath. Within it were bright green question marks that appeared to be floating in midair, an almost 3D effect. 

"If you're here to complain about the paint smell, might I invite you to use a contraption known as a door," Ed remarked, not looking away from his work. He swirled his paintbrush onto the wall, creating another question mark. "A door will often lead to a place called outside, where you are free to roam."

"Your art is incredible," I breathed. 

Ed turned around, raising his eyebrows. "Oh. I know you. Tenth floor, Wonderland."

"That's me." I smiled, feeling more at ease. "I'm Sadie, and you're Ed, right?"

His mouth twitched into a smile. "I’m at the beginning of the end and the start of eternity, I'm at the end of time and space, in the middle of yesterday but nowhere in tomorrow." He set his paintbrush on the easel next to him and watched me. "Who am I?"

"Beginning of the end...end of time and space." I snapped my fingers. "The letter E."

His eyes grew wide and he clapped his hands in delight. "Yes! Indeed. I am Edward Cory, but Ed is sufficient."

"Great. So, I was wondering if you would be open to another mural in my apartment."

His dark eyes shone. "Does it also have a secret passageway?"

"No, it's in my roommate's..." I shook my head. "My former roommate's room. Jade."

Ed's smile disappeared. "I remember her...Jade. A lovely girl. I regret that I was not able to attend her funeral, as I was... detained elsewhere." 

"Oh. Well, that's okay, not everyone could make it."

"Those men." Ed clenched his fists at his sides, his eyes taking on a rather frightening sheen. "The ones who killed her..."

"They're dead," I assured him. "In fact, Joker killed them. The Wall Street Three."

Ed grinned. "I had heard this, but was unsure of its accuracy. How wonderful. I must say, I do admire the Joker...I like his work."

"Really?" I couldn't stop the grin on my face. "So you don't mind that he's murdered people, and he's still out there?"

"All the better. Keep Gotham on edge. And murder is a rather... subjective subject, wouldn't you say? Who is to judge that his actions are detestable? The same ones who are happy to create such ghastly living conditions for anyone lacking a relation to Thomas Wayne? Preposterous." Ed sauntered to the record player, rifling through his records. "You seem keen on the subject. Shall I create a mural in his honor for your friend's memory? I would be delighted to do so, for her sake and his. And yours, of course."

"That sounds great." My heart pounded with excitement. "Would it be okay to meet later this week about it?"

"Certainly. My schedule is open." 

"Great! Well...I have to get going, but...thank you. For everything."

Ed waved his hand around and smiled. "It is no trouble. But before you go, you mentioned Wonderland, and I must admit that there is a question that I would like to ask you."

Fear tightened my stomach. "What is it?"

He smirked. "How is a raven like a writing desk?"

A sudden burst of laughter escaped me. "Oh! Well, I know one possible answer - Poe wrote on both."

"Outstanding!" Ed chuckled. "A befitting reply. I will not keep you any longer, as you clearly have plans. Good night, Sadie."

"Good night!" I turned and left, nearly skipping to the elevator. Joker's supporters were more dedicated than I'd thought. This was great news - I could keep him safe, and others could help me. 

I was starting to form a plan.


	7. We're All Mad Here

}} We're All Mad Here {{

As soon as I entered my apartment, a strange silence greeted me. I didn't expect Joker to be wandering around, but there was a stillness in the air that made my stomach clench. 

I closed the door behind me and locked it. The stillness remained, quickly becoming eerie. I couldn't stand it anymore, so I hurried to the living room and put on the news. The broadcast was about the ongoing garbage problem - no mention of Joker.

_Where is he?_

As I walked into my room, I consciously made more noise than usual, stomping my feet and nearly slamming my bedroom door closed. 

Still no sign of the Joker.

Was he...gone?

The thought immediately made me scoff. Where the hell would he go? Joker was obviously still in Wonderland, waiting for me to confirm that we were alone. 

My heart jumped as I pushed open the door to the closet, and I couldn't stop the grin that spread across my face. Knowing that I was coming home to the Joker was an absolute thrill. I had no idea what it was that we had, but knowing that he trusted me was incredible...it was an honor. And now, I could tell him that there were others who wanted the same sort of honor, and they could help carry out his vision - whatever that might be. 

The closet door opened, and the sight that greeted me made me stop short.

Joker was lying on the pillows, curled in an almost fetal position. His breathing was slow, and he didn't stir as I stepped inside the room. 

Slowly I moved forward, drawing in a sharp breath when I took a closer look. There was something under his head, between him and the pillow. It was the shirt that I'd borrowed from Jade - the one I wore the first time we slept together.

I laughed softly, my throat clenching a bit. 

_We're going to change the world._

I carefully sat next to him and gently ran my hands through his hair. He stirred, then his eyes opened and that flash of green caused my heart to quicken again. 

"Hey." I smiled and tucked a lock of brown hair behind his ear. "I'm back."

"You're back," he repeated softly, in the same uncertain tone he'd used before we began having sex. 

_Arthur._

"I got clothes for you." I lowered myself to settle next to him, reveling in the grin he gave me as I cuddled close. "Tomorrow I'm going to get more supplies."

"You're kind." His eyes searched mine as I caressed his cheek. "Why do you like me?"

I leaned forward to give him a quick kiss, then moved closer, looking into those bright, inquisitive eyes. "You're beautiful, and brave. You see what's awful out there, and you do what needs to be done. You're exactly what this city needs...and exactly what I've needed."

"I think you're beautiful too." Arthur gently stroked the back of my hand with his fingertips, making me shiver. "I want to be what you need." 

"Then kiss me," I whispered, and closed my eyes as he cupped my face in his hands. He pressed his lips to mine, then rolled me onto my back as he placed a series of soft kisses down my neck. His hands began to wander, and my body responded with a shiver of anticipation. 

I grinned and stretched as he pulled up my shirt and bra, his breath warm as his mouth closed over my breast. Arthur hummed as he sucked, his tongue circling my nipple and coaxing it to hardness.

"Mmm." I stroked his hair, letting him suckle while slipping off my shoes. He fumbled with the button on my pants, and with my help he was able to ease them down and off. Next to go was my shirt and bra, and Arthur began sucking at my other breast, reaching in between my legs to carefully run his fingers over my entrance. He moaned against my skin when he felt how wet I already was, and slowly slid his fingers inside me. I gasped and clutched at him, raising my hips as he swirled his fingers around, making my thighs tremble. 

I whimpered his name as he began kissing down my stomach, still circling his fingers against my inner walls in a slow, teasing rhythm. "Mmm, Arthur...yes, that feels good..."

"You're so soft," he whispered. His fingers kept moving as he rested his head on my thigh. He watched his hand move with a smile. "So wet. Do you always get this wet, when you're...?"

I smiled and reached down to gently stroke his hair. "Not this much. And I don't usually come that much during sex. But with you..." I drew in a sharp breath as he leaned close to gently kiss my clitoris. "Oh god...you feel so good...mmm..."

Arthur slipped his tongue out, licking at my clit and chuckling when I jolted at the sensation. He slipped his fingers out of me and sucked on them, then moved forward and placed a few soft kisses on my labia. The warm, wet sensation of his tongue slipping between my folds to press into my vagina made me clench around him instinctively, and he made a guttural sound, curling his tongue around inside me. He wrapped his arms around my legs, resting his palms on my stomach while using both thumbs to rub my clit while licking at my inner walls, moaning at the taste.

I sighed in satisfaction and spread my legs, letting him explore me as a familiar burn started to build. His eagerness was an incredible turn on, and he was clearly enjoying himself as he watched my reactions to his movements. My hands continued to stroke his hair, and I began to breathe deeply as the sensation increased, building to what was bound to be a powerful climax. 

"You're going to make me come," I whispered, and shivered. "Fuck...Arthur..."

He murmured against me, the vibrations making me gasp. His tongue pressed in deeper and began to wriggle rapidly.

An overwhelming amount of pleasure seized me, and I arched my back, moaning his name.

He kept moving, making my legs shake as I came, licking and pushing deep inside me. My nails dug into the back of his head and he growled, moving even faster, pushing me deeper into another orgasm. 

After what seemed like an eternity, my body began to calm itself again as Arthur slowly pulled away, giving my thighs soft kisses as my breathing steadied. 

"You're pretty," Arthur whispered, his head resting against my thigh. "Like a flower. So pretty, and soft."

My hands stroked his hair, playing with the soft strands. "Come up here," I said gently, and grinned when he wriggled out of his sweatpants and settled on top of me. Arthur buried his face in my neck and shivered when the head of his cock brushed against me. I wrapped my legs around him and moaned when he slipped inside me, eagerly squeezing him when he was buried to the hilt. He gasped and shivered again, whispering my name. 

Slowly he moved against me, both of us moaning helplessly. The stretch of his size was overwhelming. I grasped at his shoulders and drew in a sharp breath with every thrust. Arthur groaned and breathed heavily as he kept up the steady rhythm, occasionally whispering my name. My heart pounded itself against my chest despite his unhurried pace, and I gasped his name as my body responded to him with a sudden, aching climax.

Arthur moaned when I squeezed around him, but even when I came again, and again, he didn't slam into me like he had before. He didn't need to; I was already claimed by him, and now we could just enjoy each other. 

Soon his moans grew louder, and his movements began losing rhythm as his own orgasm approached. "Fuck... Sadie...yes..." Arthur shuddered as he grasped my hips, his nails digging into my skin. "Oh...fuck..." 

I held him close as I felt his warm release fill me. _God, I adore you. Both of you. All of you._

"Sadie." Arthur exhaled, then began to snicker, his cock still jerking inside me. He pushed his hips against me and moaned through his laughter, still holding me tightly. "Fuck...S-Sadie..." His laughter intensified, making him shake. 

I smiled and stroked his hair as he collapsed onto me. Only he could make laughter so sexy. 

Joker slipped out of me and rolled onto his back, still cackling with utter euphoria as I stretched and rubbed my legs together, feeling deliciously full. 

_Damn, there's so much...it's a good thing I'm on..._

My breathing halted. Usually I took my pill after work, before bed, but I hadn't taken it last night, with all the excitement. 

"Shit." I scrambled to my feet and ran to the bathroom. My packet was right where I left it in my medicine cabinet, and quickly took two pills and washed them down with tap water. I took a deep breath and shook my head at my reflection. "Get your shit together," I hissed to myself.

Arthur was still laughing like mad, probably still laying on the floor.

I had to focus. I couldn't be this forgetful again.

_What if..._

I scoffed and reached over to grab some toilet paper to clean myself up. It was too ridiculous to even finish the thought. I couldn't let myself get distracted. Sex with Joker was fantastic, but we had planning to do.

He was still snickering when I came back to grab my clothes. I picked them up and he reached for my hand, grinning up at me. "Hey."

"Hey." I stepped closer and smiled as he nuzzled against my stomach. I cradled his skull with my free hand and ran my fingers through his hair. "You okay?"

"Mmhmm, that was great." He gazed up at me. "Are you okay?"

"Fantastic." I giggled as he placed a series of kisses on my skin. "I'm going to order dinner. Pizza okay with you?"

"Mmm." Joker nipped at my stomach and chuckled when I jumped and squealed. "I'd rather eat _you_."

"That sounds good, but you need actual food."

Joker sunk his teeth into my hip. "What I need is you," he growled.

"You have me." I petted his hair, hoping to soothe him. "Plus I have some good news that I'll tell you while we eat. You can play with me after dinner."

Joker growled again and gave me another love bite on my hip. I was about to relent and let him do what he wanted when I heard something from the TV. 

_"... possible development on the whereabouts of Arthur Fleck, otherwise known as Joker..."_

"No," I whispered, and hurried into the living room, still clutching my discarded clothes. It wasn't possible. They couldn't know where he was, there was no way...

The reporter went on. "... anonymous tip that he's left Gotham to hide in Metropolis, with sightings increasing in our sister city..."

Joker emerged, naked, standing in the doorway with a look of contempt. "Why the fuck would I go to fucking Metropolis?"

"This is great," I breathed, hugging my clothes to my chest. "Holy shit, people are protecting you with these fake sightings."

"I suppose so." Joker walked up behind me, his hands wandering as he kissed my neck. "Come to bed," he whispered. "I'm not done with you."

I giggled and dropped my clothes, sighing as he slipped a hand between my legs. "Mmm...Joker..."

"Or I can just fuck you right here," he breathed in my ear. "Have you get on your hands and knees...take it like a good girl. You want that?"

"Fuck yes," I moaned, and whimpered as his hand slipped away. 

Joker chuckled and smacked my behind. "Show me that you want it."

I lowered myself to the floor, kneeling in front of the TV as they continued their report on the man behind me. 

_"Arthur Fleck, or Joker, is extremely dangerous, and an unstable individual..."_

"Mmm. Sounds serious," Joker muttered, positioning himself behind me. He leaned forward and began running his hands over my skin, humming in appreciation.

_"...facing charges on assault, murder, evading arrest, unlawful possession of a firearm, prison escape..."_

"You're a bad man," I whispered, and eagerly spread my legs when his hands began to caress my thighs. 

He laughed softly and let his fingers dance over my entrance. "So eager. I love that."

"I want you." I pushed my hips back and whimpered when I felt the tip of his hard cock brush against me. "Please..."

"Mmm." Joker slid in his tip, holding my hips steady so I couldn't push back for more. "You want me to fuck you hard?" he breathed.

"Yes...yes, please..."

_"...an extremely dangerous individual..."_

"Please, fuck me hard," I begged, writhing like mad and nearly sobbing. "I need you."

"You asked for it," Joker snarled, and slammed his cock inside me.

My back arched immediately as my body was filled with his long, thick length. I gasped, my fingers digging into the carpet beneath me as my mind delved into chaos.

He was big. Having him fuck me from behind meant taking him even deeper than I had before - and it felt incredible.

Joker wriggled his hips forward, and I whined as the head of his cock pressed against my cervix. My legs began to shake, and something like panic seized me until he reached down and began rubbing my clit, still pressed deep inside me. 

_"... familiar with various weapons, deadly..."_

"Oh shit, oh god...yes!" I sobbed as I came, pleasure slamming through me like tidal wave. I clenched around his cock, making him grunt and thrust his hips forward. 

"So tight." His nails dug into my hips as he fucked me, a hard, merciless rhythm that had me whimpering with satisfaction. "Feels good when you come. Such a good girl..."

"Unnh...fuck... big..." I was rendered nearly speechless by him. Every push of his hard length into me was like heaven. I kept shaking and coming, unable to stop. 

_"...might find the following disturbing..."_

"Take me," he growled, shoving himself forward.

_"How about another joke, Murray?"_

His movements stilled, and we looked up to see footage of him on the Murray Franklin show, the night Joker murdered him. 

Joker chuckled and rolled his hips, making me gasp. "I've seen this episode," he murmured, and began fucking me harder and faster.

"Oh shit!" I clutched at the carpet, waves of ecstasy rendering me helpless. He reached down and rubbed hard, relentless circles on my clit, making me jolt in his grasp. "Fuck...Joker..." 

_"...a mentally ill loner with a society that abandons him and treats him like trash?"_

"Come for me," Joker demanded, and I obeyed, keening and nearly sobbing with the force of it. 

_"I’ll tell you what you get!"_ Joker screamed on the television, building to his defining moment. _"You get what you fucking deserve!"_

"Joker," I sobbed, my body clenching around his cock. He tilted my hips up and slammed into me, filling me deep.

On the screen, Joker fired his gun, killing Murray instantly. The crowd screamed in terror and ran. 

"Fuck!" Joker spurted deep inside me, his cock jerking as he unloaded his release into me. 

"God, yes." I grinded against him, squeezing his cock as he filled me with another orgasm. "Fuck yes, come inside me..."

He slowed his thrusts as the reporter apologized for the violence and language in the now famous clip. "Such a bad man," I giggled as he squeezed my hips. 

"I can feel you laugh," he murmured, and chuckled. "Feels really fucking good."

"Mmm, I feel you laughing too." I sighed as he slipped out of me and turned me on my back. I grinned up at him as he settled on top of me. "Hi there."

Joker grinned back, stroking my hair. "Hi." He leaned down and kissed me, moaning into my mouth as I wrapped my arms around his neck. 

_Mine._

~~~}}{{~~~

After a long shower together, I headed to the kitchen to call for pizza, and as I dialed I decided to get garlic bread and some pastries as well. Joker needed his strength, and he needed to eat. Plus I was goddamn starving.

"Be back soon," I promised him, then grabbed my wallet and keys, locking the door behind me. 

Downstairs, I realized that I hadn't checked my mail in a few days. I had some time before the food arrived, so I figured I'd make sure I didn't have any bills piling up.

There were advertisements for local stores and restaurants, which I tossed in a nearby trashcan, but beneath the junk mail was a small green envelope, which made me pause. I never got personal mail, as I had no family and my only friend was Bane. 

Carefully I picked it up and turned it over. The envelope was blank. 

It could be a threat... someone who knew about the Joker. How, I had no idea. What I did know was that I was prepared to destroy anyone who would try to break what we had. If Joker had to do it, or even if I had to, they would regret threatening me. Us.

I stared at the envelope for a few moments, then tore into it, my hands shaking. Inside was a blank white card, which had all of three lines written in simple, bold lettering:

**It can be cracked, it can be made,  
It can be told, it can be played.  
What is it?**

I grinned, then noticed writing on the bottom right of the card. **I have ideas. Shall I share?** Beneath was a phone number, and the letter "E". 

_The man loves his riddles._ This was a good one. Cracked, made, told, played...

"A joke." I laughed softly to myself.

"You got that right."

I jumped, then looked over to see a woman about my age shaking her head at the store advertisements that she'd also received. "Ten percent off jewelry. Wow. Maybe now I can drape myself in diamonds instead of buying groceries. It's bullshit." She scoffed. "I should go back to using the five finger discount. I was good at that shit."

"Oh." 

"Sorry, I'm rambling." She chuckled. "It's just...the Joker was right, you know? Everyone fell to pieces over those jerks he killed, and those same people would walk over us if we were the ones dying on the sidewalk." 

I laughed. "That's true."

She pointed at me. "Sarah, right?"

"Sadie."

"Ugh, sorry." She stuck her hand out. "I'm Amanda Kyle, but everyone calls me Mandy."

"I'm Sadie." I smiled and shook her hand. "I'm sure I've seen you around, but I tend to work crazy hours."

"Me too. I work at Blackgate Casino. Games dealer." 

I nodded. "That's not far from The Velvet Lounge... I'm a dancer there."

Mandy grinned. "We probably see the same people. They start one place, go to the other, drunk the whole time." She scoffed. "Gotham's finest. And Thomas Wayne called _us_ clowns. Total bullshit."

"Well, he's not calling anybody anything now," I muttered.

Mandy stared for a moment, then snickered. "That's for damn sure. Good one. We're all clowns, right?" She slammed her mailbox door shut. "I gotta run. My little sister's upstairs, and if I leave Selina by herself too long, she gets bored and starts going through my shit. Nice to meet you, Sadie...I'll see you around." She smiled and left, her words giving me a thrill. 

_Joker's inspiring people. He's what Gotham needs._

~~~}}{{~~~

The delivery guy from Big Lou's was pretty young, and blushed when I thanked him for the food. People were walking around, checking mail and heading outside to smoke, and I worried that someone might comment on the amount of food I was getting, but I could just blame it on PMS or something if pressed.

_Wait. Am I due next week or the week after? Shit. I seriously have to get my act together. Joker needs me. He said it himself._

Once I was home, the outside world locked away, Joker came out of my bathroom with a towel around his waist and dripping wet hair. 

"Hello there." He looked me over and grinned. "You mentioned something about new clothes?"


	8. Victims In-Waiting

}} Victims In-Waiting {{

_"A source close to the Wayne family has stated that due to the numerous sightings of the Joker around Wayne Manor, young Bruce Wayne has begun self defense training. He is reportedly working with various renowned experts, including Dick Grayson, owner of Nightwing Martial Arts..."_

Joker snorted as he puffed on his cigarette. "Self defense training. For a child, to keep him safe against me. Fucking ridiculous."

I laughed. "Well, shit. I guess we'd better watch out, or a nine year old will kick our asses."

The reporter went on. _"...his parents, Thomas and Martha Wayne, were gunned down during the riots after Joker killed Murray Franklin..."_

"I didn't even kill the Waynes, but they're acting like I did. It's kind of funny." Joker yawned and stretched. "The kid's rich. He'll be fine."

"Damn right." I got up to set my paper plate in the trash. We'd wolfed down most of the food, having built up a huge appetite after having sex twice. Maybe after we settled a bit we could go again. Being with the Joker was satisfying in every way possible. I just needed to do what I could to keep him safe, and make sure his influence stayed strong in Gotham.

_"...still at large. If you have any information..."_

"Ugh, enough." Joker turned off the TV with an annoyed sigh. "It's so boring. All they do is go on about the same fucking things."

"Don't worry about any of that." I crossed the room to return to him. He sat back and beckoned me with a crooked finger as I approached. _My king._

I crawled onto his lap, and Joker chuckled and rested his hands on my hips. "Well, hello there."

"Hi." I kissed him and wrapped my arms around his neck. "All kidding aside though...you do need to protect yourself."

"Mmm." He kissed my neck, chuckling when I shivered. "Weapons?" he murmured against my skin.

I giggled and tilted my head to give him better access. "Mmm... weapons, but supporters too. People who will look out for you. Bane, Ed, and the people who helped get you out of prison."

Joker sat back and watched me with a curious smile. "What did you have in mind?"

I rested my hands on his chest and looked into his eyes. "This city should belong to you. You've given a voice to the people in Gotham who deserve it."

He smirked. "You want me to run for mayor?"

I chuckled and wriggled on his lap, feeling a thrill when he tightened his hold on me. "Mayor? Not quite."

"Interesting." He gave my body an appreciative glance, then gazed up at me. "Sounds like someone has ideas."

"It's not just me. Remember what I told you about Bane, and Ed?"

"Yeah..." Joker pulled at my shirt, grinning when I slipped it off and tossed it to the floor. "You said they were fans of mine."

"Definitely. They can help you."

"Hmm..." Joker reached up to cup my breasts, slowly running his thumbs over my nipples. I sighed and arched my back, gently rolling my hips against him. Joker growled and gently squeezed me, running his tongue over his lower lip. "Do I need help?" he murmured.

"Maybe," I whispered, trying to stay focused as he continued to lovingly stroke my skin. "If you want to rebuild Gotham, yes."

Joker paused his movements and raised an eyebrow. "Rebuild Gotham?"

I settled on his lap, stared into his eyes, and nodded. "In your image."

Joker slid his hands to my waist, his eyes darkening. "Thomas Wayne is dead. Murray Franklin is dead. They're not coming back."

I nodded again, resting my hands on his shoulders. "They're dead, but there are others out there who could harm you. People who still don't respect your influence, and go about their day passing people on the street, taking their lives for granted. They think they can take what they want, treat people like things, and lash out when we fight back." I scowled. "Like Todd."

"Todd?" Joker's eyes narrowed. "Who the fuck is Todd?"

"Some jerk at the store." I settled closer, sitting sideways on his lap so I could rest my head on his chest. 

Joker wrapped his arms around me and squeezed. "What happened?" he asked in a low, dark voice.

"Ultimately, nothing. But he tried to corner me and called me a bitch when I told him off." 

Nails dug into my hip as Joker pressed me closer to him. I yelped at the sensation, and he slightly eased his grip. "Tell me more about this guy," he growled.

"Bane scared him off. But Todd was bad-mouthing you because I laughed at him." I pressed my hand to Joker's chest, smiling as I felt his pulse beat steadily under his skin. "You scare people. You get people looking over their shoulder, as they should. Your influence should be felt all over Gotham. Every person in this city should look twice when they hear a laugh, and when they see a clown mask, they should fucking nod or bow in respect."

Joker reached up, grasping my jaw and turning my face to his. He stared directly into my eyes, searching. "Remake Gotham in my image," he echoed. 

"What Gotham fucking deserves," I replied, and smiled.

After a few moments of silence, his mouth crept up into a grin. "Revolution," he murmured, and trailed his fingertips over my cheek. "You could be my queen."

My heart jumped at his words, and I turned my head to kiss his fingers as they crept closer to my mouth. "As long as I'm with you, I'll be happy."

"Happy," he echoed, and traced my smile with his fingers. "Spreading joy and laughter."

~~~}}{{~~~

Gotham was cloaked in fear, its citizens desperate to believe that the man who became a voice for anarchy and brilliant madness would soon be brought to justice.

I walked down the hallway to Bane's apartment, my body still humming with the feel of Joker's hands caressing me. He'd whispered instructions to me, listening as I answered questions, his hands on me the whole time, stroking, exploring. We formed a skeleton of a plan, knowing something bigger was forming, something tangible and terrifying. 

Joker kissed me before I left, his teeth sinking into my lower lip. "Mine," he whispered. 

"Yours." _Always._

Another kiss, then I was sent on my way, with instructions to bring back a present. An ally.

I knocked on my friend's door, and he greeted me with a smile. 

"I need you to come with me to my place," I told him.

~~~}}{{~~~

I told my friend that Gotham needed to change, that Joker was the one to lead us, and he agreed.

I told him that I needed his help. 

Bane followed me in silence, hands in his pockets and eyes on the ground. I could almost feel the weight of his unanswered questions, but I remained silent as well. Questions could come later. 

Bane entered my apartment, eyeing the empty pizza boxes piled next to the trash can in the kitchen. He sniffed the air with a frown. "Did you leave a cigarette burning?"

"No." I closed and locked the door, standing in front of it as I tried to breathe normally. "Bane...I have something to show you."

He turned to me, his eyes wide. "You're okay, right? Did something happen?"

I nodded. "Something did happen...but it was a good thing. The best thing." Taking a deep breath, I stepped forward and took his hand, leading him to my room. 

"Um..." Bane coughed. "Sadie, I hope you're okay, and this isn't...you're like a sister to me..."

"It's not that," I reassured him, and pushed on the door to Wonderland.

Inside, the Joker stood by the window, staring out at Gotham while exhaling a cloud of smoke. He'd dressed in the purple vest and red suit I'd gotten him, looking gorgeous and sophisticated. He looked up at Bane and studied him, nodding slightly. "You must be Bane," he murmured, and smirked. "Hello."

Bane dropped my hand, staring at Joker in slack-jawed disbelief. "Holy shit," he breathed. 

A few moments passed, and my heart beat steadily as Joker returned Bane's stare. Finally Bane turned to me, his eyes wide. "Holy shit," he repeated, and grinned. "This whole time...he's been here?"

I nodded slowly, my throat tightening. _Please. Please let this be okay..._

"Holy fucking shit." Bane extended his hand to Joker, his entire body shaking. "S-sir...uh, Joker... Arthur...Mr. Fleck! It's an honor."

Joker chuckled and extended his free hand, wincing when Bane pumped it vigorously.

"Sorry! Sorry sir...Arthur...Joker." Bane stepped back and took a deep breath. "Christ. This is..." His smile faded, and he turned back to me. "Why didn't you tell me?" He asked in a small voice. "You know you can trust me. I'd never put you in danger, Sadie, never..."

Without hesitation, I rushed forward and wrapped my arms around his massive chest. "I'm sorry," I whispered. "I do trust you, but I was scared..."

Bane hugged me carefully, patting my back. He breathed deeply, calming both of us. "It's okay," he murmured. "I'm here now. I can help."

Joker watched us both silently, the cigarette smoldering in his hand. His eyes flickered to Bane, then to me, his gaze softening but remaining focused. He waited patiently, unbothered.

Gently Bane released me and looked to Joker, his expression resolute. "I'm here now. Tell me what you need."

Joker exhaled, tapping his cigarette onto the ashtray on the windowsill. "Weapons."

"Absolutely. I was going to take Sadie with me to Owl Court Weaponry to get self defense supplies." Bane cracked his knuckles. "We'll get guns, knives..."

"And a stun gun," I added. "And maybe we should take Ed."

Bane raised his eyebrows and looked to Joker, who grunted and stamped out his cigarette on the ashtray. "I should meet him first," he declared.

"Tonight?" I asked carefully.

Joker grinned and ran his tongue over his teeth. "Why not?"

~~~}}{{~~~

Bane and I didn't speak as we descended in the elevator, the secret we shared weighing heavily in the air around us. Only when the elevator stopped did he speak, turning to me with a grateful smile. "I'm glad you told me."

I returned his smile, relief flooding through me like euphoria. "Me too." 

The doors opened, and we headed to Ed's apartment, the smell of paint hovering in the hallway like a ghost. His door was open again, and Ed was standing with his back to us, looking down at a table covered with papers. One fell to the floor, and I could see a blood red smile inked onto the paper. 

"Hello," Ed greeted us without turning around. "I can hear two sets of footprints. What is it that given one, you'll have either two or none?"

Bane glanced at me. "A problem?" he guessed.

"A choice," I replied.

"Excellent! Yes. A choice." Ed turned and grinned when he saw us. "Hello! How advantageous for you both to arrive. I was just reviewing possible sketches for your mural. Have the plans changed since we last spoke?"

"Maybe." I managed what I hoped was a friendly smile. "Can you come with us to my place? To Wonderland."

Ed raised an eyebrow, eyeing Bane for a moment, then nodded. "Certainly."

He hummed to himself as we all returned to my home, my stomach in knots as I lead them through the doors that separated Joker from the world, past walls that kept him safe. 

Ed smiled to himself as he walked toward the mural he'd painted. "In a Wonderland they lie," he chanted softly. "Dreaming as the days go by...Dreaming as the summers die." He pushed on the door, strolling inside and then stopping short when he saw Joker. 

Bane stood by the door to Wonderland, closing the door behind him. His muscles tensed as he watched Ed and Joker stare each other down. 

I could hardly breathe. My stomach churned as Joker's mouth turned up in a sneer.

Ed stepped back, looking back at me and Bane, then at Joker. He coughed, then emitted a sudden, high pitched laugh. "It is seen on the dead and on the living. Found on the rich, poor, short and tall, but shared among children most of all." He giggled. "What is it?"

Joker's sneer became a delighted grin. He stepped forward, looking Ed over with great curiosity. "A smile," he replied.

"Excellent," Ed clapped his hands together. "Quite excellent. Now..." He looked back to me and Bane. "Do tell. Is there some sort of plan?"

"Weapons," I answered. 

"We're heading to Owl Court Weaponry tomorrow," Bane told him. "Well, Sadie and I are. Knives, guns..."

"Mmm, I would join you, but I am seen as a bit of a... nuisance there. I had an unfortunate encounter with the owner when he informed me that I already had far too many knives in my possession, and I demonstrated my disagreement by holding my latest purchase to his throat." Ed chuckled. "Do give him my regards. I think I might go to Ace Chemicals instead. I used to work there, before my early retirement. One could build many wondrous things from the components found there."

My heart leapt. "Bombs?" 

Ed spread his hands, fingers splayed. "Ka-boom," he whispered.

"Fuck yes," Bane breathed.

I looked to Joker, who watched us all with a joyful grin. "What are we going to do?"

"Mmm." His tongue ran over his teeth. "We're going to change the world, my queen."


	9. The Jaws That Bite

}} The Jaws That Bite {{

Owl Court Weaponry was like most stores in Gotham; open on weekends, holidays... every day, nearly every hour. Nothing was sacred, some argued, but if the citizens of Gotham needed something on Christmas, or a Sunday, I didn't see a problem with that.

The four of us - Joker, Bane, Ed, and I - had stood in Wonderland and discussed ideas - explosions, robberies, vandalism. Performances. Acts of revolution.

For that, we needed the right tools. 

When Bane and I got on the bus, we had hardly said a word to each other. Joker's command to supply him and ourselves with weapons weighed heavily over us, and while I knew Joker wouldn't hurt me - or Bane, if I fought for his life, and I would - disappointing the Joker was not an option. 

"Bring me back some toys," he'd purred, caressing my jaw before giving me a goodbye kiss. 

Owl Court Weaponry was another nearly derelict building in Gotham, a former clothing boutique that went out of business years ago and stood empty for decades until the city's demand for ammunition turned it into its current state. Dirt and grime caked the brick exterior, and the windows were rendered opaque with cloudy stains. The only thing that wasn't old and rotting was the crisp new sign on the front door that warned: **YOU ARE BEING WATCHED AND RECORDED**, which made me cringe. Buying clothes for Joker was risky, but I had the alibi of getting clothes for donations. Extra food was something that I'd have to be careful about, yet I knew I could pull it off.

But buying several guns?

I kept my head down as Bane and I entered the building, my gaze focused on the aisles of glass displays filled with deadly merchandise. As a teenager, I carried a small switchblade with me, which I occasionally had to flash at a few leering guys who followed me home after school. I never had to use it on anyone. 

I knew from my research that Joker had murdered someone in his apartment, a fellow clown who had betrayed him, as he'd told police. A witness had said Joker stabbed the other man with a pair of scissors and bludgeoned him against the wall. 

The thought of it sent a dark thrill down my spine. I'd been in a few physical altercations, but had never stabbed anyone.

"What's it like?" I'd asked Joker, when we lay in bed together the night before. I rested my head on his chest, his fingers stroking my hair. 

He laughed softly, kissing the top of my head. "Exhilarating," he whispered, and rolled me on my back. 

I exhaled at the memory of him inside me, trying to focus on the array of blades with various names - Bowie knife, bayonet, dagger.

"C'mon," Bane muttered, and headed to the back. We passed shelves of holsters and entered the clothing section, filled mostly with combat gear. Bane looked over the boots for a couple of minutes before grabbing one of the biggest pair they had. He put the boots under his arm and nodded. "Okay. On to our list."

An older man stood behind the counter and eyed us as we approached. His lips pressed together in a hard line and his gaze narrowed slightly when Bane set the boots on the counter. "Anything else?" he asked in a gravelly voice.

"We're looking to get a few other items," Bane gestured to the display of guns beneath him. "A few guns, knives..."

"A few?" The man stood back, crossing his arms. "How many is a few?"

Bane's jaw twitched. "Three guns, maybe four. Or more."

The man laughed and shook his head. "Why do you need that many? There are two of you here."

"Are you the owner?" I asked, stepping forward. 

"As a matter of fact, I am." The man turned to me and looked me over. "What's it to you?"

"Hello." I figured charm might help, so I smiled, which made his gaze soften the tiniest bit. "My name's Sadie, and this is my friend Bane. We're looking to get weapons for self defense. It's pretty crazy out there right now."

"That it is...I'm Larry Newhouse. This is my store." He grabbed the boots and shoved them in a bag. "You have two choices. You can take these boots on the house and never come back, and I don't tell the cops you were here. Or, you give me your IDs, wait here while I call the police, and you can explain to them why two people need 'three or four guns, maybe more'." Larry pushed the bag toward us, his gaze level. "What's it going to be?"

I stared at him in disbelief. "You don't want to sell us anything? Why?"

Larry scoffed. "Call me paranoid, but I don't like the look in your eyes," he said, pointing at Bane. "I've seen it before. Guy came in here, repeat customer. Always bought plenty of knives, enough for dozens of people. He came in here wanting more. I told him he already had plenty, because I don't want to have to answer to the cops when they come looking for someone. He had that same look you got in his eyes, right before he put one of my own knives to my throat."

_Ed_, I thought. "That's not..."

"Just because I sell this shit doesn't mean I'm okay with arming psychos," Larry continued, ignoring me completely. "I even got a goddamn security camera to prevent anyone from pulling a stunt like that again. Plus that Joker's still out there somewhere."

I frowned. "But we didn't-"

Larry waved away my argument. "You'll have to get your stuff elsewhere."

"The nearest weapons place is in Metropolis," I protested. Going to another city to buy guns and knives would raise all kinds of red flags. There was no way we'd be able to get what we wanted without police being notified.

"Don't care." Larry shoved the bag forward again. "Leave."

Bane's upper lip twitched into a sneer. "How the fuck are you going to run a business if you refuse service to paying customers?"

Larry leaned forward, meeting Bane's gaze. "Maybe I'll retire. In the meantime, I'll run my business however I goddamn please."

I looked away, my face burning. I wanted to jump across the counter and smash Larry's head against the glass. I wanted to tell him to watch himself, and deliver Ed's regards. But he was itching to call the police, and I didn't want to give him a reason to make that call. 

I also didn't want to disappoint Joker by telling him that we couldn't get anything. I couldn't do that. 

I wouldn't. 

Out of the corner of my eye I noticed a man standing by the daggers and watching us carefully. His black leather jacket was nicer than what you'd expect to see in downtown Gotham, but his neck tattoos and piercings made him look like he'd fit right in at any dive bar on Red Hood Lane. He nodded at me, then turned and left, striding with purpose as he exited the building.

I watched him leave and nearly shook my head in confusion. _What was that?_

Bane grabbed the bag on the counter with a huff. "Let's fucking go."

We stepped outside, the cold Gotham air striking us with a stinging blow. My fingers itched for a cigarette. I shivered, hugging myself, wanting to wrap myself in Joker's arms and lose myself in his warmth. 

Instead, I looked around, seeing the man I saw before, standing at the street corner and looking in our direction. He looked me in the eyes and nodded again before casually lighting a cigarette. 

"What the fuck are we going to do?" Bane muttered. "There's only one weapons store in Metropolis. Darkseid Firearms doesn't have as much ammunition, and they're suspicious as fuck. I tried to get a knife there a couple of years ago and they kept asking me about those stupid fucking assault charges..."

"Hold on." I gestured at the man and began walking toward him, Bane following close behind. 

"Sadie," he hissed, "What the fuck? Who is that?"

"I don't know, but he was in the store with us. He saw that we were having trouble, maybe he can help us."

Bane scoffed. "How?"

"I have no idea." I threw Bane a quick glance. "We don't have many options, though, do we?"

Bane muttered something under his breath and walked close to me. 

As we got closer, the man exhaled a cloud of smoke and looked us over. "Sounded like you were having some trouble in there. I might be able to help."

Bane looked him over. "Who are you? How exactly can you help us?"

The man gestured at the alley behind the store. "We can talk there."

We walked past piles of rotting trash bags, my stomach clenching at the smell. The man seemed unbothered and stopped in front of a faded sign for "The Iceberg Lounge". Back when the mob ran things in Gotham, this area had been home to nightclubs and speakeasies, and they'd long been shuttered up and home only to the rats that fed on garbage. 

After taking a drag on his cigarette, the man exhaled and looked us over. "My name is Max. I can get you supplies for whatever you need."

I looked Max over. He was almost eerily calm. Still, I was curious. "So you sell guns? Knives?"

Max nodded. "Yeah. You wanting to buy?"

"Is this for real?" Bane glared. "How do we know you're not a cop?"

"And why are you helping us?" I asked. "You're not curious about what we're doing?" I looked him over again and noticed a tattoo peeking out from his shirt collar, something resembling a bird's head. For some reason, it made me feel uneasy, and I quickly looked away.

Max noticed and smirked. "Curiosity can get you killed in this city. My boss has access to all kinds of merchandise. What do you have in mind?"

Bane glared at him, but I responded before Max lost interest. "Two guns a person... that's eight total. Plus bullets, and a stun gun, and knives."

Max nodded. "I can arrange that. My boss deals with cash only."

"That's fine," I assured him. I kept most of my earnings off the books, so I had cash in a safety deposit box and plenty stashed at the apartment. "How much?"

"Three thousand if you want the standard delivery of one week. Four thousand for a rush order."

Bane's jaw dropped, but I was undeterred. "How soon could we get a rush order?"

Max smirked. "Tonight."

"No way," Bane retorted. "How the hell is that possible?"

"My boss makes things happen." Max turned to me. "Do we have a deal?"

Before I could react, Bane walked up to Max, towering over him and staring daggers at him. "You're full of shit," he hissed.

Max met his gaze evenly. "I'm not."

I placed my hand on Bane's arm and gently squeezed. "We're in," I told Max.

Bane turned his glare to me. "Sadie, this seems shady as shit."

I ignored him and held my hand out to Max. "Half up front, half when we get our supplies."

Max chuckled. "You'll have to meet with my boss. He's free now, actually."

I shrugged. "Sure."

"Sadie!" Bane hissed. "Are you out of your fucking mind? You can't just..."

"I'm not letting Joker down!" I hissed back, and froze when I realized my mistake.

"Joker." Max's eyes widened. "You're with the Joker."

My mind raced to come up with a response, but Bane pointed a finger at Max. "We were never here," he growled.

Max shook his head. "My boss is a big fan of the Joker. He's definitely going to want to meet you. Now."

Bane and I exchanged a glance. "Where?" I asked, eyeing the street around us. 

"Here." Max turned to the door to the Iceberg Lounge and knocked twice, then three times. The door swung open and he gestured for us to go in. 

"This is fucking nuts," Bane muttered, but I hurried past him to go inside. It was crazy, and reckless, but I wanted to get what I came for. Plus Max knew about Joker now, thanks to my big mouth, and could use that information against us.

We had no real choice but to go in. 

The lounge was cast in darkness. Dim lamps were the only source of light to guide us, and we blindly followed Max down corridors with faded gilded wallpaper. This had been a swanky place once, but now it was a labyrinth of shadows. Voices echoed in the dark, and my nails dug into my palms. 

What had I gotten us into?

"This way," Max muttered, and we turned a corner as voices got louder. We entered a room filled with smoke and men standing next to an ornately carved desk, where a large man sat puffing on a cigarette, grunting as he counted a huge stack of money. 

"Boss," Max called out, making the man look up, "These people want to make a few purchases. They're with the Joker."

The man looked up at me and Bane, then grinned. He was stocky, with wide shoulders and arms that were covered with tattoos. He set down his glasses, which had one cracked lens, and snorted. 

"Joker's buddies, huh?" he rasped. "Where's he hiding these days?"

"Wonderland," I answered without thinking. 

The man stared at me for a moment before letting out a squawk of laughter. "Tetch has him? Fuck. Never would've guessed it."

My breath caught in my throat. Months ago, Jervis Tetch had gotten off voluntary manslaughter charges for catching his girlfriend, a schoolteacher, with another man at their apartment. He'd shot and killed them both, then covered their faces with baseball caps before fleeing the scene. The hat placements, and the fact that the girlfriend had her class notes on Alice in Wonderland strewn across the room, had earned Tetch the nickname of the Mad Hatter. 

If it got out that Tetch was hiding with Joker, that could work to our advantage. 

"Have a seat," the man at the desk offered, gesturing to the chairs in front of him. His men parted to allow us to approach. 

Bane set his boots on the table and sat down heavily. "Okay. Talk. Who are you?"

The man laughed. "I like this guy. Doesn't take shit, right to the point. You can call me Oz." He leaned forward. "Tell you what. Bring me proof that you're with Joker, and I'll give you a nice discount. Do it tonight, and you'll get your guns, knives, bullets...you name it."

Bane scowled. "What kind of proof?" 

My mind raced. I didn't care about the discount, but Oz was obviously powerful and had a lot of resources. We needed him as an ally. 

But what the hell could I bring him to prove that Joker was with me, that wouldn't put any of us in danger? A picture? A note?

Suddenly I thought of something and nearly jumped out of my seat. "I can bring you something. Tonight. How much will you charge?"

Oz sucked his teeth. "With proof? Two thousand. Cash." 

"Deal." I stood up and held out my hand while Bane hissed at me to sit down.

"Little lady's running the show. I like that." Oz cackled and stood up to shake my hand, his sweaty palm making me cringe inwardly. "No funny business, or you're getting one of my bullets right....here." Oz poked my forehead and laughed again. "Let's see what you got."


End file.
